Once again, I find that the months have flown by between posts. I know this. You know this. So, let's not pretend like I have a new excuse or anything. It's just life. It gets busy. I believe we all experience this from time to time.
But in my defense, I did get captured by Somali pirates while I was on a super secret, highly classified mission for the CIA. Any of you that have seen me around in the last two months have actually just been seeing a very advanced hologram created by our nation's top scientists in a hidden laboratory deep beneath the surface of the Earth. However, I escaped from the pirates just two days ago, completed my mission and have finally made it back here safe and sound.
And the first thing I thought to do was blog for you.
You feel bad now for getting all upset at my lack of posts, don't you?
It's cool. Your forgiven. But just remember, until you have the whole story be careful where those heated emotions may take you. That's our lesson for today.
Class dismissed.
Wait...! Actually, I came here for a purpose. Ah, yes. To wish each and every 3 of you (that's right, I have 3 readers now...) a very Merry Christmas.
The holidays can often be a time for Stacie and me that involves much planning and doing and preparing, which is great. But sometimes it's important to just slow down and know that it's all going to be fine if we don't get it all done. How can I know this? Well, I can't really. I guess if we did no planning and preparing, we'd feel pretty lame around the Christmas tree saying, "We were going to get you gifts and whatnot, but we just didn't get around to it. Love ya bunches, though!"
I'm very thankful for Stacie in that regard. She really helps to keep the throttle down on preparation where I'd rather we go grab a beer with friends and take care of it later. Sometimes my approach is necessary, but oftentimes hers is what gets us on top of our game for the holidays. So, for that, Stacie (when you read this) I'm thankful for you.
I don't write this to paint my wife with the brush of a fun-killer, though. Not true at all. She has a great way of combining getting stuff done and having a good time. I think that's because she has a motor that won't quit. She has a desire to always be accomplishing something and the ability to match it. I appreciate that. (If you ever read scouting reports on players before the NFL draft, you'll find all the best players are describe as having a great motor...Stacie would have been a very high draft pick.)
I also don't write this to paint myself as a loser husband who only wants to hang out with friends and be lazy. No, I just don't mix the two as well. I settle in and work or I shut it down and hang out. Sometimes we need to shut it down and sometimes we need our motors to be humming along. All of this is just another reason why Stacie and I are perfect for each other. You may all get grossed out at my affection now.
Regardless of your slant though (motor on or motor off---how did we get on motors?) it's important to take time to remember what we're celebrating. With so many holidays now, it seems to me we just celebrate. Why? Who cares! Let's party!
St. Patrick's Day!!! Yay!!! Drink green beer!!!!! Awesome!!!! Why...? Oh, cuz St. Patrick ran all the snakes out of Ireland. What? Why do we care?
Halloween!!! Yay!!! Get dressed up!!!! Get free candy!!!! Act like a fool!!!! Why...? Oh, cuz it's All Hallows Eve, the night before All Saints Day. And people dressed up as ghosts and ghouls and went to homes demanding offerings to keep the real ghosts and ghouls away...What...? Really...
And then there's Christmas. Yay!!! Christmas Trees and Santa!!! Presents!!!! Time off of work!!!! But why...because we celebrate the birth of Jesus, God's Son who offered Himself up as the sacrifice for mankind. The one who paid the ultimate price of death so that we could have a way to eternal life with God. (Of course, this required His resurrection as well.)(Side note - I know that people speak of a Pagan holiday that Christians overtook as their own and turned it into what we know as Christmas, but let's be honest, modern Christmas celebrates the birth of Jesus.)
Maybe it's Chicago, but there's a lot of folks up here who celebrate Christmas, not just a holiday or one of the other religious holidays around this time, but Christmas. And they celebrate Christmas while having no regard for Christ, with no claim of being a Christian, much the way they celebrate St. Patrick's Day with no regard for St. Patrick and without being Irish.
I'm not saying they can't or shouldn't. But I do find it interesting.
There's plenty of people running around (or just being lazy) and not truly celebrating. It's just a holiday to check off of the list and have as much fun as possible around. I'm not saying they don't cherish family and friends or that they don't truly have a heart for the season. But as a Christian, I feel like it is important to take a step back and a deep breath and celebrate the birth of my Savior, who knew exactly who I'd be inside and out, the good and the bad, and still chose to take my place when my debt came time to be paid.
So, Merry Christmas to each and every one of you three. My own three wisemen coming to visit my blog at Christmas...where's my frakincense and myrrh?
Friday, December 18, 2009
Saturday, September 19, 2009
Monopoly City Streets
Remember when you were a kid and you'd get into crazy long games of Monopoly with your friends (or in my case with my brother and cousins, Kyle and Kari). We'd stay up all night long playing that game, trying to bankrupt our competitors to become the world's newest tycoon.
Then as we got older, remember how you stopped wanting to play Monopoly as much. You once loved the game, but now you noticed something about it...it never ends. Never.
You'd play all day and all night, but now everyone playing was old enough to know how to now get into bankruptcy. Maybe Trait would grab the trains, I'd gobble up the light blue and yellow streets, Kari would get the utilities and some other minor properties, Kyle would snag Boardwalk and Park Place, then we'd all build and build and just hand money back forth until we got tired of playing.
Then we just quit playing because, really, what was the point?
I don't remember the last time I played Monopoly. Then yesterday I saw this:
Monopoly City Streets.
At first, I thought, "This is brilliant." Monopoly and Google Maps teamed up to make the whole world a giant Monopoly board. I started looking for streets to buy in Chicago and Dallas. A lot of streets were already bought up. There were buildings placed on the streets; you can now build stadiums and all sorts of crazy attractions.
But, then, I read this: "YOU MUST LOG IN EVERYDAY TO RECEIVE YOUR RENTAL" and "If, after 2 weeks, there has not been any activity on your account, the bank will repossess all of your streets."
This is truly the game of Monopoly that never ends. Not only does it never end, but if you want to win, you have to get online everyday to earn your rental payments. How many people right now are wasting their time doing this? Probably a lot. Count me out of this one, please.
But very ingenious idea, Monopoly and Google.
Then as we got older, remember how you stopped wanting to play Monopoly as much. You once loved the game, but now you noticed something about it...it never ends. Never.
You'd play all day and all night, but now everyone playing was old enough to know how to now get into bankruptcy. Maybe Trait would grab the trains, I'd gobble up the light blue and yellow streets, Kari would get the utilities and some other minor properties, Kyle would snag Boardwalk and Park Place, then we'd all build and build and just hand money back forth until we got tired of playing.
Then we just quit playing because, really, what was the point?
I don't remember the last time I played Monopoly. Then yesterday I saw this:
Monopoly City Streets.
At first, I thought, "This is brilliant." Monopoly and Google Maps teamed up to make the whole world a giant Monopoly board. I started looking for streets to buy in Chicago and Dallas. A lot of streets were already bought up. There were buildings placed on the streets; you can now build stadiums and all sorts of crazy attractions.
But, then, I read this: "YOU MUST LOG IN EVERYDAY TO RECEIVE YOUR RENTAL" and "If, after 2 weeks, there has not been any activity on your account, the bank will repossess all of your streets."
This is truly the game of Monopoly that never ends. Not only does it never end, but if you want to win, you have to get online everyday to earn your rental payments. How many people right now are wasting their time doing this? Probably a lot. Count me out of this one, please.
But very ingenious idea, Monopoly and Google.
Wednesday, September 9, 2009
My Right to Health Care
Alright, y'all asked for it, so I'm going to give you my dos pesos on American Health Care.
...ok, so maybe nobody actually asked for it, but that doesn't mean I can't throw out my thoughts, right? This is America. Land of the free and all.
I'm going to take the health care issue from the first person. It's so easy to talk about health care when you are talking about someone else, like some dude from Delaware and his ailing grandmother or a man with a debilitating illness in Omaha. But what about where the rubber meets the road? What happens when I think about me being that grandmother?
Hmmm...actually, let's go with me being the man from Omaha, what say ye?
Do I have a right to health care? Say I'm sick. I have insurance, but it stopped covering my costs at about $10,000 for some reason. My health care will cost me $150,000 and I may or may not get better. I'm a middle class dude and the $150,000 bill will force me into bankruptcy.
Do I have a right, as an American, to have my illness treated without paying for it myself?
I must emphatically say "no" I do not have a right to health care.
"But your either broke or dead then!"
Yeah. Under the current system, that is true. But that still doesn't mean I have a right to health care. And you know why that is?
Because in order for me to obtain health care I have to take another American's life by force.
"What...?"
Yep. Let's talk about the doctor, the guy or gal that knows how to save my life or at least salvage it. How did she get the tools to do that?
She worked her tail off, that's how. She sacrificed her time (time I spent not becoming a doctor) to get great grades in college, get into med school, graduate med school, go through internships and residency and everything else and became a doctor.
So, if I sit here and claim a right to health care, I am claiming ownership over that doctor's life. I cannot make that claim as a freedom loving American. I cannot in good conscience say that her skills and abilities are something that I have a claim on.
I believe that doctors have worked harder, studied longer and are probably smarter than I am, therefore, I believe that they should make every dime that they can for the service they provide, and to say that I have a right to their service means that either they perform it for free or someone else is taxed (taking their time and life) to pay for my health care.
And that's essentially what claiming a right to health care boils down to for me. I mean, think about the things that truly are our rights: life, liberty, the pursuit of happiness.
The right to speak freely without fear of being punished by the government for that speech (but not necessarily speech without consequences). The right to bear arms (meaning the government isn't the only one with the guns aka "power of force".) And others, such as the right to face the witnesses against us in a trial, the right to not have excessive punishment levied upon us, etc. None of the rights we claim in our Constitution are also burdens upon other people, in effect stripping them of their rights.
Undoubtedly, there are many issues with the current system of health care in America, but this idea of a right to health care that keeps creeping up is something that really gets under my skin. I'll probably need to have another blog laying out what I would do for American health care if I were king of the world. In fact, I think I will, but for now I'll just start with a bit of a tease of topics I'll broach:
...ok, so maybe nobody actually asked for it, but that doesn't mean I can't throw out my thoughts, right? This is America. Land of the free and all.
I'm going to take the health care issue from the first person. It's so easy to talk about health care when you are talking about someone else, like some dude from Delaware and his ailing grandmother or a man with a debilitating illness in Omaha. But what about where the rubber meets the road? What happens when I think about me being that grandmother?
Hmmm...actually, let's go with me being the man from Omaha, what say ye?
Do I have a right to health care? Say I'm sick. I have insurance, but it stopped covering my costs at about $10,000 for some reason. My health care will cost me $150,000 and I may or may not get better. I'm a middle class dude and the $150,000 bill will force me into bankruptcy.
Do I have a right, as an American, to have my illness treated without paying for it myself?
I must emphatically say "no" I do not have a right to health care.
"But your either broke or dead then!"
Yeah. Under the current system, that is true. But that still doesn't mean I have a right to health care. And you know why that is?
Because in order for me to obtain health care I have to take another American's life by force.
"What...?"
Yep. Let's talk about the doctor, the guy or gal that knows how to save my life or at least salvage it. How did she get the tools to do that?
She worked her tail off, that's how. She sacrificed her time (time I spent not becoming a doctor) to get great grades in college, get into med school, graduate med school, go through internships and residency and everything else and became a doctor.
So, if I sit here and claim a right to health care, I am claiming ownership over that doctor's life. I cannot make that claim as a freedom loving American. I cannot in good conscience say that her skills and abilities are something that I have a claim on.
I believe that doctors have worked harder, studied longer and are probably smarter than I am, therefore, I believe that they should make every dime that they can for the service they provide, and to say that I have a right to their service means that either they perform it for free or someone else is taxed (taking their time and life) to pay for my health care.
And that's essentially what claiming a right to health care boils down to for me. I mean, think about the things that truly are our rights: life, liberty, the pursuit of happiness.
The right to speak freely without fear of being punished by the government for that speech (but not necessarily speech without consequences). The right to bear arms (meaning the government isn't the only one with the guns aka "power of force".) And others, such as the right to face the witnesses against us in a trial, the right to not have excessive punishment levied upon us, etc. None of the rights we claim in our Constitution are also burdens upon other people, in effect stripping them of their rights.
Undoubtedly, there are many issues with the current system of health care in America, but this idea of a right to health care that keeps creeping up is something that really gets under my skin. I'll probably need to have another blog laying out what I would do for American health care if I were king of the world. In fact, I think I will, but for now I'll just start with a bit of a tease of topics I'll broach:
- What has happened to charity in America? I promise this relates to health care.
- Why is health care so expensive? If nobody (or only a very few) can afford health care, how can doctors and hospitals stay in business?
- Are doctors making too much money? (But wait, I thought you just said that doctors deserve every dime they can make?)
- The last time you went to the doctor, how much did it cost? I don't care what you paid. What was the cost?
- On what planet does it make sense to have health insurance tied to employment?
- Is health insurance really insurance?
Thursday, August 27, 2009
Come and Blog It Annual Prediction of How the NFL Season Will Play Out
This may be the earliest I have ever jumped into my annual NFL predictions, which if you'll kindly notice has a name now. Kind of rolls right off the tongue. Then it lands on the floor and explodes and gets all over your shoes. Sorry about that.
Technically it's about the same time as last year, but I usually get through Week 3 of the preseason before diving in to my picks.
There are a couple of reasons for the early timing of this post:
First off, I normally like to wait until most of the preseason has played out in order to have a better grasp on injuries, rookies, new coaches and players, etc. However, I've come to the realization that none of that really matters. Tom Brady was injured on the first play of the regular season last year; the Patriots still went 11-5, but missed the playoffs. Had he been injured in the preseason, I would've predicted their season to be a total disaster.
And let's be honest, with all of that preseason info thrown in last year, I correctly predicted 2 of the division champions and only 5 of 12 playoff teams. But that's what makes the NFL the most popular sports league in this country. It is a league where anything is possible and this time of year in particular optimism reigns supreme.
Secondly, I've been holding out all year for a true summer, and I just don't think it's coming. We've had a couple of really warm days, much more so than last year anyway. But this summer the consistency has been way off. It's 66 and raining today. It's August. The average temperature for July here was 68.9 degrees. Are you freaking kidding me? Much like Dr. Evil's request for sharks with freakin' laser beams on their heads, I have only one simple request as well: a July with a freakin' average temperature in the 70s!
I guess neither one of us will get our way anytime soon. That being the case, I figured I might as well embrace that which cometh with the autumn: the NFL, baby!
So, here we go. You and me. No testing the temperature of the water; we're just diving in, head first with no floaties. I don't really know what that analogy means, but nevertheless, I will see you on the other side. I've sprinkled some videos in for your entertainment as well (and mine). You'll notice a theme: they're all pretty old and pretty entertaining. That's a good theme if you ask me.
Usually I start out with the AFC North, my team's home division. This year I figured I'd change it up. Let's go West to East. Left to Right. It'll be just like reading. Try to keep up...
NFC WEST
The Cardinals. Who saw that coming? Now this division has me a little confused. Seattle thinks they're going to compete again now that they took Housh away from my Bengals. Grrr. And now that Hassleback is apparently healthy. I think the Seahawks will be better than last year, but that's like saying I think the next movie that I watch (anything) will be better than the last movie that I watched (Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skulls.) It's hard to watch a worse movie than that one. And the 'Hawks will have to work to have a worse year than last season. The question now becomes "can the Cardinals build off of last year's success?" I think they can. They have a really nice offense and a defense that is improving. So, against all that history has told me, here goes.
Prediction
ARIZONA CARDINALS
2. Seattle Seahawks - getting old
3. St. Louis Rams - getting healthy
4. San Francisco 49ers - getting on-the-job training
AFC WEST
This division got interesting in a hurry during the off season. Maybe in a bad way, but definitely interesting. Jay Cutler was a little peeved at Denver for firing their coaches and started whining. Then new coach Josh McDaniels sat Cutler down and said hey man we love you; you're our dude. And then immediately tried to trade for Matt Cassel. Cutler got super angry, demanded a trade and ended up getting traded to the Chicago Bears. All of this while Cassel went to division rival Kansas City. And once all of this went down, Brandon Marshall, troubled yet talented Denver receiver, has now decided he wants a trade, too. But since they traded Cutler, there's no way they want to trade Marshall. They'll head down a very slippery slope then. It's a bit confusing, but fun. Kind of like this:
At the end of the day, it probably doesn't matter because the Chargers are the cream of this crop. Although I like what the Chiefs are building, they just won't be there yet.
Prediction
SAN DIEGO CHARGERS
2. Denver Broncos - still have talent
3. Kansas City Chiefs - still have offensive issues
4. Oakland Raiders - still have Al Davis
NFC NORTH
Much the same as the AFC West got more interesting, so did the NFC North. The Bears were the beneficiaries of Denver's inept HR moves, so now Chicago is believing they've finally found a quarterback. Especially since the only one they've ever had do anything for them was this guy:
Outrageousness indeed. That's not even a word.
Will finally having a QB put the Bears into Super Bowl contention? I don't think so. That defense has been on a downhill slide since their last Super Bowl run. And the division is filled with some good offenses, the Lions notwithstanding, of course.
This division comes down to the Vikings or Packers. If the Packers can even improve their defense a little, they could be a very tough match up for the rest of the NFC. Plus they serve a chili cheese dog at Lambeau where the cheese is mac and cheese...that should win them a title more often than it does.
Prediction
GREEN BAY PACKERS
2. Minnesota Vikings - no good QB playing
3. Chicago Bears - no good WR playing
4. Detroit Lions - no good football player playing
AFC NORTH
Obviously, I'm picking the Bengals to win this division. I mean did you see the Ocho kick that extra point? What else do you need to win it all!!!? Okay, so I'm not picking the Bengals. I want to because I want them to win. If I want it bad enough it can happen, right?
Actually, I'm beginning to have injury concerns for my boy Carson Palmer. He has not played a lot of football lately if you haven't noticed, and now he rolls up his ankle in preseason play...not a good sign. I believe if the Bengals get a full year out of Palmer they compete for the division title. But that's mainly because of their much improved defense. If the offense can even become a shadow of its former self and have an ordinary top 15 defense that could be enough.
But it's a tough division. Baltimore never seems to run out of good players and I'd write about Pittsburgh, but everyone knows about them already: great D, manageable O, wins Super Bowls.
Oh forget it! I'm picking the Bungles! I was wrong about everything last year, so maybe this will be an unexpected correct pick.
Pr
ediction
CINCINNATI BENGALS
2. Pittsburgh Steelers - probably going to be the ones who really win the North
3. Baltimore Ravens - probably going to finish second in the North
4. Cleveland Browns - probably going to wish they were in the NFC West
NFC SOUTH
I think I've picked New Orleans to win this division two years in a row now. And two years in a row the Saints have let me down, despite Mr. Brees and his fantastic throwing arm. So now, I'm going a new route. I really like what the Falcons are doing in the post-Vick era. Matt Ryan appears to be the real deal. Michael Turner can run, White and Jennings can catch and now they went out and got Tony Gonzalez to be a security blanket of sorts for Ryan. And they've done all of this while maintaining a decent defense. I think this division will play tough, but I really like the Atlanta Falcons.
Prediction
ATLANTA FALCONS
2. Carolina Panthers - great running game, iffy QB play at times
3. New Orleans Saints - great passing game, iffy everything else at times
4. Tampa Bay Buccaneers - great weather, iffy football
AFC SOUTH
Can Indianapolis maintain its very sound footballing into a Tony Dungee-less era? As long as it's not a Peyton Manning-less era, all is well with Colts football. I believe a repositioning year of sorts took place for the Colts last season. I don't want to call it a rebuilding year because it wasn't really. Marvin Harrison was there, but he wasn't. The running game was there, but it wasn't. Manning was adjusting to new players; they were adjusting to him. And through all of that, the Colts still had a nice year.
The Titans will be very strong this year, too. They are a solid stable organization with two pretty fantastic running backs. Unfortunately for the other guys in this division this probably spells out a pretty tough year. I could see the Texans making some noise, but I say that every year. And Jacksonville is never a slouch of a team, but despite last year's second place finish, I think this is still Manning's division and everyone else is just playing in it.
Prediction
INDIANAPOLIS COLTS
2. Tennessee Titans - Can Kerry Collins still get it done?
3. Houston Texans - Can they get out of their own way?
4. Jacksonville Jaguars - Can they ever find a decent WR?
NFC EAST
Usually a difficult division for me to predict, the NFC East has made it no easier this year. About the only thing that I can guarantee is that the Redskins will finish last. I'm having a hard time taking the Cowboys seriously. Ever since Tony Romo botched the hold in their playoff game against the Seahawks, this team has seemed more like a caricature of itself than a true Dallas Cowboys team. So for me, this thing comes down to a Giants team that I always seem to under appreciate and an Eagles team that I constantly distrust because of Donovan McNabb's accuracy issues.
What to do, what to do? Gotta go with the G-Men here. Manning seems to be improving and gaining his teammates confidence. The ground game looks good. Kevin Boss is a nice tight end. I said is, not has. And the defensive line seems to be locked and loaded again. If you get pressure on the quarterback, that quarterback becomes mediocre. Whether it's Tom Brady or Rex Grossman, they are going to struggle.
Pred
ictions
NEW YORK GIANTS
2. Dallas Cowboys - Will the real Dallas Cowboys please stand up?
3. Philadelphia Eagles - Will Brian Westbrook hold up?
4. Washington Redskins - Will Chris Cooley ever shut up? (I kid, I like Cooley and his antics.)
AFC EAST
Two years ago, the Patriots were on the verge of another Super Bowl title when Eli Manning and the Giants D-Line defeated the 18-0 team, thwarting their efforts to surpass the 1972 Miami Dolphins as the only team to go a full season without losing. Last year, before the train even left the station, all-world QB and part time male model Tom Brady was lying in pain on the turf, out for the season. You'd think the Patriots would've been done at that point, but somehow (Matt Cassel) rebounded to go 11-5 yet still missed the playoffs. Now, where there was no debate before, some are arguing amongst themselves about whether Pittsburgh may be the team of this decade. Some say if the Steelers can get another world championship this year, they could unseat the Team of the Early 2000s as team of the...00s.? The 2000s? How do you say that anyway?
Regardless. Right now I picture Bill Belechick standing in front of this year's Lombardi Trophy saying these words:
I'm not going to stand in his way. So, Patriots, you get the nod.
Prediction
NEW ENGLAND PATRIOTS
2. Miami Dolphins - Love that Wildcat, sick of the word "Wildcat"
3. New York Jets - Love that Sanchez, sick of Rex Ryan
4. Buffalo Bills - Love me some me, sick of T.O.
PLAYOFFS...?! PLAYOFFS...?!
NFC:
1. New York Giants
2. Atlanta Falcons
3. Green Bay Packers
4. Arizona Cardinals
Wild Cards:
5. Minnesota Vikings
6. Dallas Cowboys
AFC:
1. New England Patriots
2. San Diego Chargers
3. Indianapolis Colts
4. Cincinnati Bengals
Wild Cards:
5. Pittsburgh Steelers
6. Tennessee Titans
SUPER BOWL:
ARIZONA CARDINALS
VS.
NEW ENGLAND PATRIOTS
CHAMPIONS:
NEW ENGLAND PATRIOTS
Technically it's about the same time as last year, but I usually get through Week 3 of the preseason before diving in to my picks.
There are a couple of reasons for the early timing of this post:
First off, I normally like to wait until most of the preseason has played out in order to have a better grasp on injuries, rookies, new coaches and players, etc. However, I've come to the realization that none of that really matters. Tom Brady was injured on the first play of the regular season last year; the Patriots still went 11-5, but missed the playoffs. Had he been injured in the preseason, I would've predicted their season to be a total disaster.
And let's be honest, with all of that preseason info thrown in last year, I correctly predicted 2 of the division champions and only 5 of 12 playoff teams. But that's what makes the NFL the most popular sports league in this country. It is a league where anything is possible and this time of year in particular optimism reigns supreme.
Secondly, I've been holding out all year for a true summer, and I just don't think it's coming. We've had a couple of really warm days, much more so than last year anyway. But this summer the consistency has been way off. It's 66 and raining today. It's August. The average temperature for July here was 68.9 degrees. Are you freaking kidding me? Much like Dr. Evil's request for sharks with freakin' laser beams on their heads, I have only one simple request as well: a July with a freakin' average temperature in the 70s!
I guess neither one of us will get our way anytime soon. That being the case, I figured I might as well embrace that which cometh with the autumn: the NFL, baby!
So, here we go. You and me. No testing the temperature of the water; we're just diving in, head first with no floaties. I don't really know what that analogy means, but nevertheless, I will see you on the other side. I've sprinkled some videos in for your entertainment as well (and mine). You'll notice a theme: they're all pretty old and pretty entertaining. That's a good theme if you ask me.
COME AND BLOG IT 2009 PREDICTION OF HOW THE NFL SEASON WILL PLAY OUT!!
Usually I start out with the AFC North, my team's home division. This year I figured I'd change it up. Let's go West to East. Left to Right. It'll be just like reading. Try to keep up...
NFC WEST
The Cardinals. Who saw that coming? Now this division has me a little confused. Seattle thinks they're going to compete again now that they took Housh away from my Bengals. Grrr. And now that Hassleback is apparently healthy. I think the Seahawks will be better than last year, but that's like saying I think the next movie that I watch (anything) will be better than the last movie that I watched (Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skulls.) It's hard to watch a worse movie than that one. And the 'Hawks will have to work to have a worse year than last season. The question now becomes "can the Cardinals build off of last year's success?" I think they can. They have a really nice offense and a defense that is improving. So, against all that history has told me, here goes.
Prediction
ARIZONA CARDINALS
2. Seattle Seahawks - getting old
3. St. Louis Rams - getting healthy
4. San Francisco 49ers - getting on-the-job training
AFC WEST
This division got interesting in a hurry during the off season. Maybe in a bad way, but definitely interesting. Jay Cutler was a little peeved at Denver for firing their coaches and started whining. Then new coach Josh McDaniels sat Cutler down and said hey man we love you; you're our dude. And then immediately tried to trade for Matt Cassel. Cutler got super angry, demanded a trade and ended up getting traded to the Chicago Bears. All of this while Cassel went to division rival Kansas City. And once all of this went down, Brandon Marshall, troubled yet talented Denver receiver, has now decided he wants a trade, too. But since they traded Cutler, there's no way they want to trade Marshall. They'll head down a very slippery slope then. It's a bit confusing, but fun. Kind of like this:
At the end of the day, it probably doesn't matter because the Chargers are the cream of this crop. Although I like what the Chiefs are building, they just won't be there yet.
Prediction
SAN DIEGO CHARGERS
2. Denver Broncos - still have talent
3. Kansas City Chiefs - still have offensive issues
4. Oakland Raiders - still have Al Davis
NFC NORTH
Much the same as the AFC West got more interesting, so did the NFC North. The Bears were the beneficiaries of Denver's inept HR moves, so now Chicago is believing they've finally found a quarterback. Especially since the only one they've ever had do anything for them was this guy:
Outrageousness indeed. That's not even a word.
Will finally having a QB put the Bears into Super Bowl contention? I don't think so. That defense has been on a downhill slide since their last Super Bowl run. And the division is filled with some good offenses, the Lions notwithstanding, of course.
This division comes down to the Vikings or Packers. If the Packers can even improve their defense a little, they could be a very tough match up for the rest of the NFC. Plus they serve a chili cheese dog at Lambeau where the cheese is mac and cheese...that should win them a title more often than it does.
Prediction
GREEN BAY PACKERS
2. Minnesota Vikings - no good QB playing
3. Chicago Bears - no good WR playing
4. Detroit Lions - no good football player playing
AFC NORTH
Obviously, I'm picking the Bengals to win this division. I mean did you see the Ocho kick that extra point? What else do you need to win it all!!!? Okay, so I'm not picking the Bengals. I want to because I want them to win. If I want it bad enough it can happen, right?
Actually, I'm beginning to have injury concerns for my boy Carson Palmer. He has not played a lot of football lately if you haven't noticed, and now he rolls up his ankle in preseason play...not a good sign. I believe if the Bengals get a full year out of Palmer they compete for the division title. But that's mainly because of their much improved defense. If the offense can even become a shadow of its former self and have an ordinary top 15 defense that could be enough.
But it's a tough division. Baltimore never seems to run out of good players and I'd write about Pittsburgh, but everyone knows about them already: great D, manageable O, wins Super Bowls.
Oh forget it! I'm picking the Bungles! I was wrong about everything last year, so maybe this will be an unexpected correct pick.
Pr
edictionCINCINNATI BENGALS
2. Pittsburgh Steelers - probably going to be the ones who really win the North
3. Baltimore Ravens - probably going to finish second in the North
4. Cleveland Browns - probably going to wish they were in the NFC West
NFC SOUTH
I think I've picked New Orleans to win this division two years in a row now. And two years in a row the Saints have let me down, despite Mr. Brees and his fantastic throwing arm. So now, I'm going a new route. I really like what the Falcons are doing in the post-Vick era. Matt Ryan appears to be the real deal. Michael Turner can run, White and Jennings can catch and now they went out and got Tony Gonzalez to be a security blanket of sorts for Ryan. And they've done all of this while maintaining a decent defense. I think this division will play tough, but I really like the Atlanta Falcons.
Prediction
ATLANTA FALCONS
2. Carolina Panthers - great running game, iffy QB play at times
3. New Orleans Saints - great passing game, iffy everything else at times
4. Tampa Bay Buccaneers - great weather, iffy football
AFC SOUTH
Can Indianapolis maintain its very sound footballing into a Tony Dungee-less era? As long as it's not a Peyton Manning-less era, all is well with Colts football. I believe a repositioning year of sorts took place for the Colts last season. I don't want to call it a rebuilding year because it wasn't really. Marvin Harrison was there, but he wasn't. The running game was there, but it wasn't. Manning was adjusting to new players; they were adjusting to him. And through all of that, the Colts still had a nice year.
The Titans will be very strong this year, too. They are a solid stable organization with two pretty fantastic running backs. Unfortunately for the other guys in this division this probably spells out a pretty tough year. I could see the Texans making some noise, but I say that every year. And Jacksonville is never a slouch of a team, but despite last year's second place finish, I think this is still Manning's division and everyone else is just playing in it.
Prediction
INDIANAPOLIS COLTS
2. Tennessee Titans - Can Kerry Collins still get it done?
3. Houston Texans - Can they get out of their own way?
4. Jacksonville Jaguars - Can they ever find a decent WR?
NFC EAST
Usually a difficult division for me to predict, the NFC East has made it no easier this year. About the only thing that I can guarantee is that the Redskins will finish last. I'm having a hard time taking the Cowboys seriously. Ever since Tony Romo botched the hold in their playoff game against the Seahawks, this team has seemed more like a caricature of itself than a true Dallas Cowboys team. So for me, this thing comes down to a Giants team that I always seem to under appreciate and an Eagles team that I constantly distrust because of Donovan McNabb's accuracy issues.
What to do, what to do? Gotta go with the G-Men here. Manning seems to be improving and gaining his teammates confidence. The ground game looks good. Kevin Boss is a nice tight end. I said is, not has. And the defensive line seems to be locked and loaded again. If you get pressure on the quarterback, that quarterback becomes mediocre. Whether it's Tom Brady or Rex Grossman, they are going to struggle.
Pred
ictionsNEW YORK GIANTS
2. Dallas Cowboys - Will the real Dallas Cowboys please stand up?
3. Philadelphia Eagles - Will Brian Westbrook hold up?
4. Washington Redskins - Will Chris Cooley ever shut up? (I kid, I like Cooley and his antics.)
AFC EAST
Two years ago, the Patriots were on the verge of another Super Bowl title when Eli Manning and the Giants D-Line defeated the 18-0 team, thwarting their efforts to surpass the 1972 Miami Dolphins as the only team to go a full season without losing. Last year, before the train even left the station, all-world QB and part time male model Tom Brady was lying in pain on the turf, out for the season. You'd think the Patriots would've been done at that point, but somehow (Matt Cassel) rebounded to go 11-5 yet still missed the playoffs. Now, where there was no debate before, some are arguing amongst themselves about whether Pittsburgh may be the team of this decade. Some say if the Steelers can get another world championship this year, they could unseat the Team of the Early 2000s as team of the...00s.? The 2000s? How do you say that anyway?
Regardless. Right now I picture Bill Belechick standing in front of this year's Lombardi Trophy saying these words:
I'm not going to stand in his way. So, Patriots, you get the nod.
Prediction
NEW ENGLAND PATRIOTS
2. Miami Dolphins - Love that Wildcat, sick of the word "Wildcat"
3. New York Jets - Love that Sanchez, sick of Rex Ryan
4. Buffalo Bills - Love me some me, sick of T.O.
PLAYOFFS...?! PLAYOFFS...?!
NFC:
1. New York Giants
2. Atlanta Falcons
3. Green Bay Packers
4. Arizona Cardinals
Wild Cards:
5. Minnesota Vikings
6. Dallas Cowboys
AFC:
1. New England Patriots
2. San Diego Chargers
3. Indianapolis Colts
4. Cincinnati Bengals
Wild Cards:
5. Pittsburgh Steelers
6. Tennessee Titans
SUPER BOWL:
ARIZONA CARDINALS
VS.
NEW ENGLAND PATRIOTS
CHAMPIONS:
NEW ENGLAND PATRIOTS
Monday, August 17, 2009
Who Knows Where Thoughts Come From, They Just Appear
So, the official brother of Come and Blog It, Trait over at The Contemplative Tulsan (which I would have named "Tulsa Spelled Backwards is A Slut") recently posted a Random Thoughts piece. I like to do those every now and then and was inspired to do something I've been thinking about for a while.
I will use my Blackberry to take down the random thoughts that rattle around in my skull while I'm driving around selling tools. Then when I get home tonight, I'll post it.
You never know what I'll see or hear that will inspire my thought.
This should be interesting.
1) Where'd Kotter go? Was he gone long? What was he doing? I know everyone was really excited to have him back, but where the heck was he?
2) One of my accounts is hosting a charity bbq in September. They want me to give them something to raffle off. I say I'll see what I can do, but also say, why don't I also support you with a special deal on our tools during the event. Dude totally freaks out about not wanting to look like he's using a charity event to make money. Wants the event to just be about raising money for the charity. Thinks it would look bad to use it to make money.
Really dude? Who cares if you make money and raise money at the same time? Plus, like anyone thinks you're doing this 100% out of the kindness of your heart. If that were the case, you'd have this think in a park somewhere not in your store's parking lot.
If you were reading Atlas Shrugged right now like me, you'd be shaking your head at this, too.
3) The Fox River in northern Illinois is really pretty. I'd like to canoe it sometime. Or maybe kayak it. Canoes and kayaks are pretty much the same thing except you have more room for snacks in a canoe. I like snacks while boating, so I'd probably canoe it.
4) I miss The Ticket in Dallas. Great radio. I don't think there's a funnier radio segment than "Gay or Not Gay."
5) I love electricity. I mean, seriously, how cool is that stuff? And how cool is it that man harnessed this energy current that can totally kill him? While everyone was else was cowering during thunderstorms, crazy Ben Franklin was saying, "I wonder if I can catch the flash of light in the sky and do something with it." And he did.
Then crazy dudes like Edison and the extremely underrated Tesla took it to a whole new level. Sometimes I wish I had studied electricity, but then I realize that I probably have my screws secured too tightly to do anything spectacular like those guys.
6) So, I keep a pen clipped onto my shirt all the time. A salesman should have a pen and business cards on him at all times, no excuses. Well, about 3 visits ago, I went to use my pen and couldn't find it. I went back to my truck. I looked everywhere. Nothing.
I just found it. It was hanging out inside my shirt, gettin' all cozy with my belly button. I guess I missed when I went to clip it on.
7) I've met a couple of guys within the last week whose wives just up and left them. I have no idea what to say to that. It sucks. I don't feel like that will ever be something I'll go through, but it still challenges me to be the best husband I can be. Hopefully, I'm that already to her. And it makes me hurt for them. A lot of the time I have to write down things or I forget to pray for them. Not this. I feel like every couple of hours I get burdened to lift these dudes up.
8) I like to sing songs from The Sound of Music and get them stuck in other people's heads. By people I mean, Stacie.
"How do you solve a problem like Maria..."
"Edelweis, edelweis, every morning you greet me..."
"The hills are alive........with the sound of music....."
I hope I didn't just have my man card yanked. The Sound of Music has some very manly stuff in it: Nazis, rugged mountains, intrigue,, double agents, and rampant male chauvinism. It also has all the singing...and nuns...and making clothes out of curtains...and all the singing...
9) Good night, Wesley. I'll most likely kill you in the morning.
Well, there you have it. A day riding around with Ty's brain. Hope you found it to be...better than what you would have been doing otherwise.
I will use my Blackberry to take down the random thoughts that rattle around in my skull while I'm driving around selling tools. Then when I get home tonight, I'll post it.
You never know what I'll see or hear that will inspire my thought.
This should be interesting.
1) Where'd Kotter go? Was he gone long? What was he doing? I know everyone was really excited to have him back, but where the heck was he?
2) One of my accounts is hosting a charity bbq in September. They want me to give them something to raffle off. I say I'll see what I can do, but also say, why don't I also support you with a special deal on our tools during the event. Dude totally freaks out about not wanting to look like he's using a charity event to make money. Wants the event to just be about raising money for the charity. Thinks it would look bad to use it to make money.
Really dude? Who cares if you make money and raise money at the same time? Plus, like anyone thinks you're doing this 100% out of the kindness of your heart. If that were the case, you'd have this think in a park somewhere not in your store's parking lot.
If you were reading Atlas Shrugged right now like me, you'd be shaking your head at this, too.
3) The Fox River in northern Illinois is really pretty. I'd like to canoe it sometime. Or maybe kayak it. Canoes and kayaks are pretty much the same thing except you have more room for snacks in a canoe. I like snacks while boating, so I'd probably canoe it.
4) I miss The Ticket in Dallas. Great radio. I don't think there's a funnier radio segment than "Gay or Not Gay."
5) I love electricity. I mean, seriously, how cool is that stuff? And how cool is it that man harnessed this energy current that can totally kill him? While everyone was else was cowering during thunderstorms, crazy Ben Franklin was saying, "I wonder if I can catch the flash of light in the sky and do something with it." And he did.
Then crazy dudes like Edison and the extremely underrated Tesla took it to a whole new level. Sometimes I wish I had studied electricity, but then I realize that I probably have my screws secured too tightly to do anything spectacular like those guys.
6) So, I keep a pen clipped onto my shirt all the time. A salesman should have a pen and business cards on him at all times, no excuses. Well, about 3 visits ago, I went to use my pen and couldn't find it. I went back to my truck. I looked everywhere. Nothing.
I just found it. It was hanging out inside my shirt, gettin' all cozy with my belly button. I guess I missed when I went to clip it on.
7) I've met a couple of guys within the last week whose wives just up and left them. I have no idea what to say to that. It sucks. I don't feel like that will ever be something I'll go through, but it still challenges me to be the best husband I can be. Hopefully, I'm that already to her. And it makes me hurt for them. A lot of the time I have to write down things or I forget to pray for them. Not this. I feel like every couple of hours I get burdened to lift these dudes up.
8) I like to sing songs from The Sound of Music and get them stuck in other people's heads. By people I mean, Stacie.
"How do you solve a problem like Maria..."
"Edelweis, edelweis, every morning you greet me..."
"The hills are alive........with the sound of music....."
I hope I didn't just have my man card yanked. The Sound of Music has some very manly stuff in it: Nazis, rugged mountains, intrigue,, double agents, and rampant male chauvinism. It also has all the singing...and nuns...and making clothes out of curtains...and all the singing...
9) Good night, Wesley. I'll most likely kill you in the morning.
Well, there you have it. A day riding around with Ty's brain. Hope you found it to be...better than what you would have been doing otherwise.
Saturday, July 18, 2009
Where've Y'all Been?
My blog has been looking all over for you.
Last time we saw you was sometime in April. You may think that this is my fault, but you'd be looking at the situation all wrong. No. You see, my blog and I have been out looking for you.
In May, we went to Milwaukee for a week to look for you. Twice. You weren't there which wasn't entirely surprising, but we had to start somewhere, right? Since I was in Milwaukee and my company was putting on some training sessions, I decided to participate in those. I was there anyway, right?
Then later in May we went to Dallas to see if we could find you. We didn't find you, but we did have a great time celebrating our little niece, Hallie's, first birthday and we saw lots of family. Me, Come and Blog It and my wife.
We also looked for y'all on the golf course once in May. I shot a 108. You weren't there either. Well, you weren't in the rough, the water or any of the sand traps. It's possible you were on the fairways or the greens.
Then, in early June, we found one of you. My cuz, Kelli came up to Chi to hang out. We had a really good time looking for the rest of you. We looked at a Reckless Kelly concert and at Mary Poppins downtown. No luck. We looked for you at the Green City Market in Lincoln Park and ate some delicious crepes while our eyes darted back and forth scanning the area. We even looked for you during my flag football playoff game. Our quarterback must have been looking for you, too because he threw 4 interceptions leading us to a nice beat down.
Kelli left town then, and we were back to square one.
Next thing I knew, it was my birthday. We decided to take a break from looking for you then. It was my birthday after all. I turned 29. I contemplated writing something poignant and introspective about that to try and lure you out, but I knew you wouldn't fall for that kind of cheese. Plus, the more I thought about it the less it seemed that turning 29 mattered.
After my birthday, we went back to the hardcore search for my readers. We looked at Million Dollar Quartet which is a musical that relives the one and only time Johnny Cash, Carl Perkins, Jerry Lee Lewis and Elvis Presley played together at Sun Records. We were really surprised to not find any of you there because it was awe-wait for it-some!
Then we checked at Schuba's at The Damnwells concert. Not surprised you weren't there. I've been to two of their live shows and they just haven't wowed me. Love their music, just not live.
Then, I put on a fake mustache and we went looking for you...you know, just in case you were intentionally hiding from us. We went to see a band called Stache, too while we were at it. No luck there either.
You had to be sad since we couldn't find you anywhere, so we thought what better place to go than the House of "Blues". We had a whole team of folks out looking for you there. We even got way up high in an opera box so we could look down on the poor saps in general admission...sorry, but we thought you might be one of the saps.
The Avett Brothers happened to be playing there, too. You weren't there, but man, you should have been. The Avett Brothers live is one of the coolest musical experiences on the face of the earth right now. I would describe it for you right now, but trying to use mere words to describe that show would be useless and futile. Find out when they are coming to your area, call my friends Cory and Millie and go with them. Trust me, they'll come for the Avetts.
We spent the Fourth of July searching for you with my friends Lance and Kali. However, unless you were at Game Stop or on my couch while we played Grand Slam Tennis and Mario Strikers then once again my search was a failure. We also tried to find you at Chicago Pizza and Oven Grinder. Once again, no luck. But man, was that a delicious place to look for y'all.
Finally, we thought we'd try looking for you in Dallas again since we were a bit preoccupied during our last search there. We looked for you at Trinity Hall with my brother-in-law and soon to be brother-in-law. Then we searched La Hacienda Ranch. After that we searched The Village Church during my wife's little sister's wedding. But it was 103 degrees that day and I was in a black suit, so I probably was a little to focused on me to find you that day.
After all of that, I thought of one last place that I hadn't looked. And here you are. All of you, right there at your own computer. Some of you are procrastinating at work. A few of you are just killing time on a Saturday afternoon. Many of you are uncontrollably weeping tears of joy now that we've reconnected. I can't say I blame you for that.
Well, I feel much better now that I've found y'all. Try not to go disappearing on me again for so long if you can help it, okay?
Last time we saw you was sometime in April. You may think that this is my fault, but you'd be looking at the situation all wrong. No. You see, my blog and I have been out looking for you.
In May, we went to Milwaukee for a week to look for you. Twice. You weren't there which wasn't entirely surprising, but we had to start somewhere, right? Since I was in Milwaukee and my company was putting on some training sessions, I decided to participate in those. I was there anyway, right?
Then later in May we went to Dallas to see if we could find you. We didn't find you, but we did have a great time celebrating our little niece, Hallie's, first birthday and we saw lots of family. Me, Come and Blog It and my wife.
We also looked for y'all on the golf course once in May. I shot a 108. You weren't there either. Well, you weren't in the rough, the water or any of the sand traps. It's possible you were on the fairways or the greens.
Then, in early June, we found one of you. My cuz, Kelli came up to Chi to hang out. We had a really good time looking for the rest of you. We looked at a Reckless Kelly concert and at Mary Poppins downtown. No luck. We looked for you at the Green City Market in Lincoln Park and ate some delicious crepes while our eyes darted back and forth scanning the area. We even looked for you during my flag football playoff game. Our quarterback must have been looking for you, too because he threw 4 interceptions leading us to a nice beat down.
Kelli left town then, and we were back to square one.
Next thing I knew, it was my birthday. We decided to take a break from looking for you then. It was my birthday after all. I turned 29. I contemplated writing something poignant and introspective about that to try and lure you out, but I knew you wouldn't fall for that kind of cheese. Plus, the more I thought about it the less it seemed that turning 29 mattered.
After my birthday, we went back to the hardcore search for my readers. We looked at Million Dollar Quartet which is a musical that relives the one and only time Johnny Cash, Carl Perkins, Jerry Lee Lewis and Elvis Presley played together at Sun Records. We were really surprised to not find any of you there because it was awe-wait for it-some!
Then we checked at Schuba's at The Damnwells concert. Not surprised you weren't there. I've been to two of their live shows and they just haven't wowed me. Love their music, just not live.
Then, I put on a fake mustache and we went looking for you...you know, just in case you were intentionally hiding from us. We went to see a band called Stache, too while we were at it. No luck there either.
You had to be sad since we couldn't find you anywhere, so we thought what better place to go than the House of "Blues". We had a whole team of folks out looking for you there. We even got way up high in an opera box so we could look down on the poor saps in general admission...sorry, but we thought you might be one of the saps.
The Avett Brothers happened to be playing there, too. You weren't there, but man, you should have been. The Avett Brothers live is one of the coolest musical experiences on the face of the earth right now. I would describe it for you right now, but trying to use mere words to describe that show would be useless and futile. Find out when they are coming to your area, call my friends Cory and Millie and go with them. Trust me, they'll come for the Avetts.
We spent the Fourth of July searching for you with my friends Lance and Kali. However, unless you were at Game Stop or on my couch while we played Grand Slam Tennis and Mario Strikers then once again my search was a failure. We also tried to find you at Chicago Pizza and Oven Grinder. Once again, no luck. But man, was that a delicious place to look for y'all.
Finally, we thought we'd try looking for you in Dallas again since we were a bit preoccupied during our last search there. We looked for you at Trinity Hall with my brother-in-law and soon to be brother-in-law. Then we searched La Hacienda Ranch. After that we searched The Village Church during my wife's little sister's wedding. But it was 103 degrees that day and I was in a black suit, so I probably was a little to focused on me to find you that day.
After all of that, I thought of one last place that I hadn't looked. And here you are. All of you, right there at your own computer. Some of you are procrastinating at work. A few of you are just killing time on a Saturday afternoon. Many of you are uncontrollably weeping tears of joy now that we've reconnected. I can't say I blame you for that.
Well, I feel much better now that I've found y'all. Try not to go disappearing on me again for so long if you can help it, okay?
Thursday, April 9, 2009
Apparently Our Give a Damn is Broken
Today is a very busy work day for me, but interestingly enough I've gotten a second or two of downtime where I can't get to a meaningful account call nor can I move on to my next scheduled event.
So, as I'm caught between things, I thought it'd be fun to try something new: blogging from my Blackberry. So, hopefully this works out.
It's been said you can tell how popular a pastor is by how many people show up for church, but you can tell how popular God is by how many show for the prayer meeting.
That's the first thing that came to my mind as I voted in the Illinois 5th District special election to fill Rham Emmanuel's vacated Congressional seat.
I voted late in the day and was the 38th voter at my polling place. Later, I learned that the Democratic candidate Mike Quigley won the election with 70% of the vote.
Voter turnout was a paltry 9%.
Are you kidding me? Quigley is just another typical Chicago politician. He preaches change, but he's as wrapped up in the Chicago machine as anyone else.
I know that I live in a heavily Democrat populated area, but you can't tell me there aren't 25,000 Republicans in it. That's what it would've taken to defeat Quigley and push the contest to Rosanna Pulido, a true candidate of change.
Unfortunately the mantra of change is the pastor everyone loves, but actually showing up to vote, that's like going to the prayer meeting on Monday night. That's just a little too much committment.
6% of the population (70% of9%) chose who represents our district in Washington.
No wonder politicians think they can do anything. Nobody cares.
I guess we get the government we deserve.
So, as I'm caught between things, I thought it'd be fun to try something new: blogging from my Blackberry. So, hopefully this works out.
It's been said you can tell how popular a pastor is by how many people show up for church, but you can tell how popular God is by how many show for the prayer meeting.
That's the first thing that came to my mind as I voted in the Illinois 5th District special election to fill Rham Emmanuel's vacated Congressional seat.
I voted late in the day and was the 38th voter at my polling place. Later, I learned that the Democratic candidate Mike Quigley won the election with 70% of the vote.
Voter turnout was a paltry 9%.
Are you kidding me? Quigley is just another typical Chicago politician. He preaches change, but he's as wrapped up in the Chicago machine as anyone else.
I know that I live in a heavily Democrat populated area, but you can't tell me there aren't 25,000 Republicans in it. That's what it would've taken to defeat Quigley and push the contest to Rosanna Pulido, a true candidate of change.
Unfortunately the mantra of change is the pastor everyone loves, but actually showing up to vote, that's like going to the prayer meeting on Monday night. That's just a little too much committment.
6% of the population (70% of9%) chose who represents our district in Washington.
No wonder politicians think they can do anything. Nobody cares.
I guess we get the government we deserve.
Monday, March 30, 2009
Day One down. Can I get to Day 2?
P90X.
Ever heard of it?
I decided a few weeks ago that it was something I needed to try for a couple of reasons. But before I get into that, let me tell you what exactly is this P90X I speak of. To put it simply, it is a workout program you can do from the comfort of your own home.
To give be more specific, you pay a guy to come to your home and smack you around every morning. Well, he doesn't actually show up. But he's right there on my TV, gloating about how he could "do a hundred of these push ups" while I struggle to execute my 12th.
What possessed me to invite such a barbarian into my home?
Great question. See, my friend PJ introduced me to the program a few weeks ago. He's been doing it, and it's muscled him up a bit. I've been wanting to get back the muscle definition I used to have for a while now, but even when I would go to the gym I always did the same things and never really progressed like I wanted.
Plus, the way I see it, I can order P90X, buy the necessary equipment I need and I'm out $300 or so. To keep my gym membership (in Chicago, mind you) for a year is almost a grand. Granted P90X is a 90 day workout. But let's be honest, did I go to the gym 90 days last year?
Actually, I think I did, but certainly not enough to justify the expense. And once I finish this program, hopefully, I'll be fit enough to maintain my sweet bod with regular running and biking and push ups and such. We'll see.
There's another little thing, the mean man in the TV has insisted I do.
Eat smartly.
He even gave me a book.
I should throw it at him.
I kid, I kid. I actually eat okay. Thankfully, I married a woman who, other than her notorious candy-loving sweet tooth and occasional craving for cheap hot wings, likes to eat fresh and healthy. Ergo, I eat fresh and healthy.
But still, with me doing all of this work, I don't want to screw it up by eating so-so. So, I guess the only bacon I'll be seeing for a while will be this guy:
Hit me with that fine strip o' bacon!
Bye-bye, Reese's Pieces that I love so much. Adios, too much chips and guacamole.
Those are pretty much my food vices.
I did Day One this morning. I was pretty sure that I was going to throw up half-way through, but I just paused it and laid on the floor with my eyes closed for a few minutes. Then I unpaused and the jerk told me that it was okay to push the pause button but don't sit down. He suggested I "shake it out", whatever that means. "It" was definitely almost "out" though, for sure.
Can I make Day Two? I think so. But Day 90? Lord, beer me strength.
Ever heard of it?
I decided a few weeks ago that it was something I needed to try for a couple of reasons. But before I get into that, let me tell you what exactly is this P90X I speak of. To put it simply, it is a workout program you can do from the comfort of your own home.
To give be more specific, you pay a guy to come to your home and smack you around every morning. Well, he doesn't actually show up. But he's right there on my TV, gloating about how he could "do a hundred of these push ups" while I struggle to execute my 12th.
What possessed me to invite such a barbarian into my home?
Great question. See, my friend PJ introduced me to the program a few weeks ago. He's been doing it, and it's muscled him up a bit. I've been wanting to get back the muscle definition I used to have for a while now, but even when I would go to the gym I always did the same things and never really progressed like I wanted.
Plus, the way I see it, I can order P90X, buy the necessary equipment I need and I'm out $300 or so. To keep my gym membership (in Chicago, mind you) for a year is almost a grand. Granted P90X is a 90 day workout. But let's be honest, did I go to the gym 90 days last year?
Actually, I think I did, but certainly not enough to justify the expense. And once I finish this program, hopefully, I'll be fit enough to maintain my sweet bod with regular running and biking and push ups and such. We'll see.
There's another little thing, the mean man in the TV has insisted I do.
Eat smartly.
He even gave me a book.
I should throw it at him.
I kid, I kid. I actually eat okay. Thankfully, I married a woman who, other than her notorious candy-loving sweet tooth and occasional craving for cheap hot wings, likes to eat fresh and healthy. Ergo, I eat fresh and healthy.
But still, with me doing all of this work, I don't want to screw it up by eating so-so. So, I guess the only bacon I'll be seeing for a while will be this guy:
Hit me with that fine strip o' bacon!
Bye-bye, Reese's Pieces that I love so much. Adios, too much chips and guacamole.
Those are pretty much my food vices.
I did Day One this morning. I was pretty sure that I was going to throw up half-way through, but I just paused it and laid on the floor with my eyes closed for a few minutes. Then I unpaused and the jerk told me that it was okay to push the pause button but don't sit down. He suggested I "shake it out", whatever that means. "It" was definitely almost "out" though, for sure.
Can I make Day Two? I think so. But Day 90? Lord, beer me strength.
Friday, February 27, 2009
The Other Side of the Table
I've had a thought several times, but for some reason or another I just haven't put it out there yet, but basically it goes like this:
There are a lot of seriously unqualified people out there affecting people's lives.
Exhibit A: I was recently at the University of Illinois doing first-round interviews of students for our recruiting process.
Read into that what you will. The point is, I'm looking across the table at these kids, and I'm thinking, "I'm just a kid. What am I doing?" And I'm betting they're thinking, "Seriously? This guy's just a kid." I don't know. Maybe I don't look like a kid anymore, but although I'm almost out of my upper middle twenties, I don't know that I'll ever see my self as a real adult.
It was weird being on the other side of the table for a change. And you know what was the worst? I was nervous. Not as nervous as when I interviewed for jobs, but I still had a few butterflies in the basket, yet I was supposed to be "in charge." Why was I nervous to grill some kids on why they should come work for us? Who knows...?
Exhibit B: Congress.
Take a little trip through the bios of our Senators and Representatives if you've got time. Most of them have zero experience in the real world outside of politics. Sure they were smart enough to get into a great school, get a law degree or whatever, but why does that coupled with getting elected a few times all of the sudden give you the necessary experience to make decisions that affect the entire country and parts of the world? Seriously, just begin to peruse the bios of the people running this country and think about whether you'd hire these folks to manage a car wash for you, let alone decide how to confiscate and then spend billions upon billions of dollars.
Exhibit C: High School Coaches
I made several decisions and formulated several thoughts and ideas in high school based on information gathered from my high school coaches. Now, I'm not lumping every coach into this category. I know a lot of good ones who may even wind up being great ones. Coaches that I would have no problem teaching my future-as-of-yet-non-existent children things. Take my friend Zach for example. Great guy, I'm sure a great coach and one who really imparts valuable things to kids.
But many of my coaches didn't even want to be coaches. As I look back with "more grown-up" eyes. I can see that their intersection with my life was just a pit stop on the way to figuring out who they were. But there they were, teaching me how to block and tackle and hit like they were experts. There they were, giving advice on life and lessons on how to live as a young man as though they had perfected it. There they were, putting me and many others I'm sure in the wrong position because that was easier than taking the time to figure out where a young kid might be most successful down the road.
All of these examples, me included, are instances where one person or a group of people make important decisions and perform important tasks that affect other people's lives. I just don't believe people take that responsibility seriously enough. And I certainly don't believe that just because a person is in a position of authority that means they are qualified for said position of authority.
Growing up is weird. It changes my perspective. I'm not sure how I feel about that.
There are a lot of seriously unqualified people out there affecting people's lives.
Exhibit A: I was recently at the University of Illinois doing first-round interviews of students for our recruiting process.
Read into that what you will. The point is, I'm looking across the table at these kids, and I'm thinking, "I'm just a kid. What am I doing?" And I'm betting they're thinking, "Seriously? This guy's just a kid." I don't know. Maybe I don't look like a kid anymore, but although I'm almost out of my upper middle twenties, I don't know that I'll ever see my self as a real adult.
It was weird being on the other side of the table for a change. And you know what was the worst? I was nervous. Not as nervous as when I interviewed for jobs, but I still had a few butterflies in the basket, yet I was supposed to be "in charge." Why was I nervous to grill some kids on why they should come work for us? Who knows...?
Exhibit B: Congress.
Take a little trip through the bios of our Senators and Representatives if you've got time. Most of them have zero experience in the real world outside of politics. Sure they were smart enough to get into a great school, get a law degree or whatever, but why does that coupled with getting elected a few times all of the sudden give you the necessary experience to make decisions that affect the entire country and parts of the world? Seriously, just begin to peruse the bios of the people running this country and think about whether you'd hire these folks to manage a car wash for you, let alone decide how to confiscate and then spend billions upon billions of dollars.
Exhibit C: High School Coaches
I made several decisions and formulated several thoughts and ideas in high school based on information gathered from my high school coaches. Now, I'm not lumping every coach into this category. I know a lot of good ones who may even wind up being great ones. Coaches that I would have no problem teaching my future-as-of-yet-non-existent children things. Take my friend Zach for example. Great guy, I'm sure a great coach and one who really imparts valuable things to kids.
But many of my coaches didn't even want to be coaches. As I look back with "more grown-up" eyes. I can see that their intersection with my life was just a pit stop on the way to figuring out who they were. But there they were, teaching me how to block and tackle and hit like they were experts. There they were, giving advice on life and lessons on how to live as a young man as though they had perfected it. There they were, putting me and many others I'm sure in the wrong position because that was easier than taking the time to figure out where a young kid might be most successful down the road.
All of these examples, me included, are instances where one person or a group of people make important decisions and perform important tasks that affect other people's lives. I just don't believe people take that responsibility seriously enough. And I certainly don't believe that just because a person is in a position of authority that means they are qualified for said position of authority.
Growing up is weird. It changes my perspective. I'm not sure how I feel about that.
Friday, February 6, 2009
The Cardinals, and Other Near Misses
I was so close to picking the Cardinals to go to the Super Bowl this year...I mean, they were pretty much third on my list of four possible teams that could be in the big game. It really came down to me just not being certain if their improved defense would carry them past the NFC Championship Game.
Man, I wish I could have that one back.
Ok, so, if you believe what I just wrote you obviously did not read my annual entry of prognostication on how the NFL season will play out. I can't believe you missed it; it was riveting. Highly entertaining.
However, for what it brought to the table in entertainment value, it may have lacked just as much in accuracy. But unlike other "experts" who throw around opinions and never take responsibility for them, I feel the need to step up, face the music and be held accountable for my awful predictions.
So, I present the Annual Come and Blog It Prognostication on How the NFL Season Will Play Out Music Facing Entry!
Disclaimer 1: this entry contains sports related material. I promise to do my best to make such material entertaining for all, but if "sports really aren't you're thing" you should probably check out an archived post for fun today.
Let's start with my Divisional Predictions:
AFC NORTH
Prediction Actual
1.Pittsburgh 1.Pittsburgh
2. Cleveland 2.Baltimore
3. Cincinnati 3.Cincinnati
4. Baltimore 4.Cleveland
Now, you'll notice here that I was 2 for 4. Not too shabby. I was surprisingly accurate in some of my comments as well. For instance:
"...the Steelers are having some offensive line issues, the Ravens are having major QB issues, the Bengals have defense and offensive sync issues and the Browns have defensive back and 'was last year for real' issues."
Joe Flacco ruined my Ravens comment, but other than that, I'd say the rest of those comments were very accurate this year. The Bengals defense did start to find some identity towards the end of the season.
My best prediction from this division came with these words however:
"...I see the Steelers having the most success because Ben Rothlisberger is a QB that is capable of making the line look good with some mobility and the fact that he is 8'10" and refuses to fall down when someone hits him."
How true was that this season? I must have watched 'Berger take about 90 hits and not go to the ground, and that was just in the playoffs.
Now I have to put this video here to wash the stains of Steeler praise off of my blog:
NFC NORTH
Prediction Actual
1. Green Bay 1.Minnesota
2. Minnesota 2.Chicago
3. Chicago 3.Green Bay
4. Detroit 4.Detroit
Wow, I missed on everything here. Here's my quote of significance from the prediction post:
"...I think the Packers have this thing. They return a pretty solid defense from last year and if Rodgers can just drive the bus through the parking lot that is the NFC North without crashing it into a light pole the Pack should win the division title."
Turns out, Rodgers did a helluva job. But that defense that I deemed "solid" turned out to be the bad drivers on this team.
And I thought the Lions would be bad, but 0-16? That takes skill.
AFC SOUTH
Prediction Actual
1. Indianapolis 1.Tennessee
2. Houston 2.Indianapolis
3. Jacksonville 3.Houston
4. Tennessee 4.Jacksonville
Indianapolis did a good job of letting everybody else get a bit of lead before Peyton did his thing and propelled the Colts to the 2 spot. This Titans team really caught me off guard as you'll notice from this quote:
"...The rest of the team around VY is a bit average."
See, what I meant to say was they should bench VY because he is making this team a bit average. I don't know how that wound up on my screen, but it was obviously not what I intended. I am an expert.
NFC SOUTH
Prediction Actual
1. New Orleans 1.Carolina
2. Tampa Bay 2.Atlanta
3. Atlanta 3.Tampa Bay
4. Carolina 4.New Orleans
What!? Oh I can't believe this happened! This one somehow inverted itself in my prediction post. I am calling blogger and registering a complaint right now. To think they can make me, an expert, look like such a fool and that I'll just sit here and take it! They messed with the wrong expert.
In my defense I did say:
"...But seriously, the division makes me feel like Kramer trying to fill in for Movie Phone.
'Why Don't You Just Tell Me What Order You're Going to Finish In!?'"
So once again:
AFC WEST
Prediction Actual
1. San Diego 1.San Diego
2. Denver 2.Denver
3. Oakland 3.Oakland
4. Kansas City 4.Kansas City
"...This should be a pretty straightforward division as well."
I couldn't have said it better myself. In fact, I did say that. It was so straightforward that the Chargers had to win their last 4 while the Broncos lost their last 3 to win the division.
You don't think Come and Blog It had anything to do with that, do you? You do? Well, of course I did! Here's how it went down. I called up Norv Turner and told him to get his boys in gear or I'd use the power of the blogosphere to make sure that he never worked in the NFL again. Ever. Then I called up Mike Shanahan and told him that I was cashing in the favor he owed me (I let him have the title of Ultimate Leader for his bio a few years back; he'd been begging me to let him use it for years, and finally I relented. But I said, "You owe me man!") So, I had Mike lose the last three games of the year, so that I'd pick one division correctly. I assured him that I would use the power of the blogosphere to make sure he did not get fired. I kinda forgot to do that...I got a little busy with work. And the playoffs were just so dang good...oops. Sorry, Mike. Call me.
NFC WEST
Prediction Actual
1. Seattle 1.Arizona
2. St. Louis 2.San Francisco
3. Arizona 3.Seattle
4. San Francisco 4.St. Louis
I was this close on the Cardinals. I mean it. Check out what I said:
"...The Cardinals and 49ers are not good football teams right now. Maybe they'll prove me wrong soon..."
See that. Maybe they (meaning the Cardinals) will prove me wrong (meaning go to the Super Bowl) soon (meaning this year). Now read it again:
"...The Cardinals and 49ers are not good football teams right now. Maybe the Cardinals will go to the Super Bowl this year..."
That's the kind of expert analysis you can take to the bank. And year in and year out I even do the dirty work for you by putting it in those tiny little analysis rollers for you so the bank doesn't yell at you when you strut in with the good stuff.
AFC EAST
Prediction Actual
1. New England 1.Miami
2. Buffalo 2.New England
3. New York 3.New York
4. Miami 4. Buffalo
I decided after 2006 to never vote against the Patriots as long as Tom Brady was playing for them. I voted for the Patriots this year before I knew Tom Brady would exit the season with an ACL tear. Had I known that, I probably would have picked them third and still would've been wrong.
Buffalo really let me down this year. Much to the chagrin of my friend Meg (a Buffalo native, honorary Texan and die hard Bills fan) I said this about the Bills:
"...They're not exactly at four-time Super Bowl loser potential, but maybe one-time playoff game loser potential."
Granted, this was a bit of a backhanded compliment to the team's rising potential, but given the performance of this team, I now deem the comment justified. In fact, my praise of Lee Evans prior to the season is even that much more embarrassing after what he did to my fantasy football team.
You know what? The Bills are going on notice, Colbert style. Now that makes The Bills and Winter who are on my list. They'd better get cozy because I don't see either one coming off that list any time soon.
NFC EAST
Prediction Actual
1. Dallas 1.New York
2. Philadelphia 2.Philadelphia
3. New York 3.Dallas
4. Washington 4.Washington
The Cowboys blew this one. Granted, Romo getting hurt for 4 games didn't help their cause, but the Cowboys only played up to their potential in 3 or 4 games this year. Maybe their potential is overrated. Then, they get beat 44-6 by the Eagles with the playoffs on the line.
Embarrassing.
Of course, I said this about the Giants:
"...And now that the Giants have lost some of their D-linemen to injury and retirement can they repeat the success of last season?"
I think that was a fair question. And they had a nice season. They just ran into a hot Philly team in the playoffs. But I look for the Giants to perform even better next year now that I saw this bit of journalism:
PLAYOFFS
Not a lot to discuss here folks. I correctly picked only 5 of the 12 playoff teams. Shameful.
And my two Super Bowl contestants didn't even make the playoffs (though at 11-5, it's a bit of a shame, or justice, that the Pats didn't merit an invitation.)
But that's why I, like so many of you, love the NFL. You just never know what might happen. Now I go into sports hibernation until Opening Day, with a brief glimpse at March Madness.
But in the not-so-distant future I will once again put virtual pen to virtual paper and tell you exactly what will happen in the upcoming NFL season. And you can bank on my picks. Because I'm an expert.
Man, I wish I could have that one back.
Ok, so, if you believe what I just wrote you obviously did not read my annual entry of prognostication on how the NFL season will play out. I can't believe you missed it; it was riveting. Highly entertaining.
However, for what it brought to the table in entertainment value, it may have lacked just as much in accuracy. But unlike other "experts" who throw around opinions and never take responsibility for them, I feel the need to step up, face the music and be held accountable for my awful predictions.
So, I present the Annual Come and Blog It Prognostication on How the NFL Season Will Play Out Music Facing Entry!
Disclaimer 1: this entry contains sports related material. I promise to do my best to make such material entertaining for all, but if "sports really aren't you're thing" you should probably check out an archived post for fun today.
Let's start with my Divisional Predictions:
AFC NORTH
Prediction Actual
1.Pittsburgh 1.Pittsburgh
2. Cleveland 2.Baltimore
3. Cincinnati 3.Cincinnati
4. Baltimore 4.Cleveland
Now, you'll notice here that I was 2 for 4. Not too shabby. I was surprisingly accurate in some of my comments as well. For instance:
"...the Steelers are having some offensive line issues, the Ravens are having major QB issues, the Bengals have defense and offensive sync issues and the Browns have defensive back and 'was last year for real' issues."
Joe Flacco ruined my Ravens comment, but other than that, I'd say the rest of those comments were very accurate this year. The Bengals defense did start to find some identity towards the end of the season.
My best prediction from this division came with these words however:
"...I see the Steelers having the most success because Ben Rothlisberger is a QB that is capable of making the line look good with some mobility and the fact that he is 8'10" and refuses to fall down when someone hits him."
How true was that this season? I must have watched 'Berger take about 90 hits and not go to the ground, and that was just in the playoffs.
Now I have to put this video here to wash the stains of Steeler praise off of my blog:
NFC NORTH
Prediction Actual
1. Green Bay 1.Minnesota
2. Minnesota 2.Chicago
3. Chicago 3.Green Bay
4. Detroit 4.Detroit
Wow, I missed on everything here. Here's my quote of significance from the prediction post:
"...I think the Packers have this thing. They return a pretty solid defense from last year and if Rodgers can just drive the bus through the parking lot that is the NFC North without crashing it into a light pole the Pack should win the division title."
Turns out, Rodgers did a helluva job. But that defense that I deemed "solid" turned out to be the bad drivers on this team.
And I thought the Lions would be bad, but 0-16? That takes skill.
AFC SOUTH
Prediction Actual
1. Indianapolis 1.Tennessee
2. Houston 2.Indianapolis
3. Jacksonville 3.Houston
4. Tennessee 4.Jacksonville
Indianapolis did a good job of letting everybody else get a bit of lead before Peyton did his thing and propelled the Colts to the 2 spot. This Titans team really caught me off guard as you'll notice from this quote:
"...The rest of the team around VY is a bit average."
See, what I meant to say was they should bench VY because he is making this team a bit average. I don't know how that wound up on my screen, but it was obviously not what I intended. I am an expert.
NFC SOUTH
Prediction Actual
1. New Orleans 1.Carolina
2. Tampa Bay 2.Atlanta
3. Atlanta 3.Tampa Bay
4. Carolina 4.New Orleans
What!? Oh I can't believe this happened! This one somehow inverted itself in my prediction post. I am calling blogger and registering a complaint right now. To think they can make me, an expert, look like such a fool and that I'll just sit here and take it! They messed with the wrong expert.
In my defense I did say:
"...But seriously, the division makes me feel like Kramer trying to fill in for Movie Phone.
'Why Don't You Just Tell Me What Order You're Going to Finish In!?'"
So once again:
AFC WEST
Prediction Actual
1. San Diego 1.San Diego
2. Denver 2.Denver
3. Oakland 3.Oakland
4. Kansas City 4.Kansas City
"...This should be a pretty straightforward division as well."
I couldn't have said it better myself. In fact, I did say that. It was so straightforward that the Chargers had to win their last 4 while the Broncos lost their last 3 to win the division.
You don't think Come and Blog It had anything to do with that, do you? You do? Well, of course I did! Here's how it went down. I called up Norv Turner and told him to get his boys in gear or I'd use the power of the blogosphere to make sure that he never worked in the NFL again. Ever. Then I called up Mike Shanahan and told him that I was cashing in the favor he owed me (I let him have the title of Ultimate Leader for his bio a few years back; he'd been begging me to let him use it for years, and finally I relented. But I said, "You owe me man!") So, I had Mike lose the last three games of the year, so that I'd pick one division correctly. I assured him that I would use the power of the blogosphere to make sure he did not get fired. I kinda forgot to do that...I got a little busy with work. And the playoffs were just so dang good...oops. Sorry, Mike. Call me.
NFC WEST
Prediction Actual
1. Seattle 1.Arizona
2. St. Louis 2.San Francisco
3. Arizona 3.Seattle
4. San Francisco 4.St. Louis
I was this close on the Cardinals. I mean it. Check out what I said:
"...The Cardinals and 49ers are not good football teams right now. Maybe they'll prove me wrong soon..."
See that. Maybe they (meaning the Cardinals) will prove me wrong (meaning go to the Super Bowl) soon (meaning this year). Now read it again:
"...The Cardinals and 49ers are not good football teams right now. Maybe the Cardinals will go to the Super Bowl this year..."
That's the kind of expert analysis you can take to the bank. And year in and year out I even do the dirty work for you by putting it in those tiny little analysis rollers for you so the bank doesn't yell at you when you strut in with the good stuff.
AFC EAST
Prediction Actual
1. New England 1.Miami
2. Buffalo 2.New England
3. New York 3.New York
4. Miami 4. Buffalo
I decided after 2006 to never vote against the Patriots as long as Tom Brady was playing for them. I voted for the Patriots this year before I knew Tom Brady would exit the season with an ACL tear. Had I known that, I probably would have picked them third and still would've been wrong.
Buffalo really let me down this year. Much to the chagrin of my friend Meg (a Buffalo native, honorary Texan and die hard Bills fan) I said this about the Bills:
"...They're not exactly at four-time Super Bowl loser potential, but maybe one-time playoff game loser potential."
Granted, this was a bit of a backhanded compliment to the team's rising potential, but given the performance of this team, I now deem the comment justified. In fact, my praise of Lee Evans prior to the season is even that much more embarrassing after what he did to my fantasy football team.
You know what? The Bills are going on notice, Colbert style. Now that makes The Bills and Winter who are on my list. They'd better get cozy because I don't see either one coming off that list any time soon.
NFC EAST
Prediction Actual
1. Dallas 1.New York
2. Philadelphia 2.Philadelphia
3. New York 3.Dallas
4. Washington 4.Washington
The Cowboys blew this one. Granted, Romo getting hurt for 4 games didn't help their cause, but the Cowboys only played up to their potential in 3 or 4 games this year. Maybe their potential is overrated. Then, they get beat 44-6 by the Eagles with the playoffs on the line.
Embarrassing.
Of course, I said this about the Giants:
"...And now that the Giants have lost some of their D-linemen to injury and retirement can they repeat the success of last season?"
I think that was a fair question. And they had a nice season. They just ran into a hot Philly team in the playoffs. But I look for the Giants to perform even better next year now that I saw this bit of journalism:
PLAYOFFS
Not a lot to discuss here folks. I correctly picked only 5 of the 12 playoff teams. Shameful.
And my two Super Bowl contestants didn't even make the playoffs (though at 11-5, it's a bit of a shame, or justice, that the Pats didn't merit an invitation.)
But that's why I, like so many of you, love the NFL. You just never know what might happen. Now I go into sports hibernation until Opening Day, with a brief glimpse at March Madness.
But in the not-so-distant future I will once again put virtual pen to virtual paper and tell you exactly what will happen in the upcoming NFL season. And you can bank on my picks. Because I'm an expert.
Thursday, January 22, 2009
It's Important to Build Rapport With Your Audience
I decided about 5 minutes ago that I was done working for the day. I had a whole list of tasks to get done that I started at 8AM. I have accomplished all that I can for the day; I'm tired, so I decided to do the only thing that made sense to me.
Stop working and go play The Legend of Zelda on my Wii.
Oh, that's right...old school Nintendo on my shiny new toy. Stacie and I played Zelda last night until 11.30. Any of your wives play Nintendo with y'all until 11.30 at night? Didn't think so. I win.
Last night I mentioned that we needed to find Link's boomerang to which Stacie responded, "Who's Link?" Well, it turns out she's not alone in her lack of knowledge. A quick search of the world wide web will inform you that most people think the character you use in The Legend of Zelda is, in fact, Zelda. But Zelda is the princess you are trying to save from the Evil Gannon. I'm pretty sure you don't see her at all in the entire game, so it can be understandable why one might think Link is actually Zelda.
I wrote that last paragraph in order to prove to you the vastness of the knowledge bouncing around in my brain. You see, if I convince you that I am knowledgeable in completely useless things, hopefully you will count me as knowledgeable in very useful things. It's called building rapport with the audience. Each time I build rapport with you in this post, I will note it with an * so that you can pause and really appreciate the moment.
Obviously, I am not saving Princess Zelda right now. Zelda has been in need of saving since July of 1987* so I figure she can wait a few more minutes. A lot has happened over the past few days (such as the PlayStation cell phone being put on hold due to less than desirable technical quality*) and I feel like I should comment.
First, we inaugurated America's first not-completely-white President*. Yes that's a rapport building asterisk there because I'm pretty sure everyone thinks he is black. He is. But he is equally white. Truly a president for all!! Except the Hispanics...and Native Americans...and Asians. Did I pull everyone into my very inclusive circle there. Well, if your ethnicity was not listed this is for you "...and Other/Choose Not to Answer." Actually...that's what President Obama would have to check!
If I missed anybody, I'm pretty sure Joseph Lowery, who helped lead the Montgomery Bus Boycott in 1955*, covered them.
Someday, as a white, I hope to do what is right. Amen.
In related current events, President Bush must have felt lighter than air (to find the weight of air: m/V = p / RT = 101325 N/m2 * 1 m3 / (287 J/kg-K * 273.15 K) = 1.2925 kg/m3)* when he woke up Wednesday morning. The weight of the world ( 6,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 kilograms, though technically that is the mass of the earth because we get weight from the earth's gravity which obviously doesn't pull on itself)* was literally off of his shoulders. In the now 7.5 years following 9/11 he has done what he promised to do and ensured no terrorist attack took place on American soil under his watch. Everything else is debatable, but that one point is not. And for that and for his service I say thank you. I had the chance to meet and interact with President Bush once when he was the Governor of the Great State*. He's a good man. Much like I'm sure President Obama is a good man. To disagree with his policies and decisions is one thing, but to treat the man like a dog's turd is a whole other story. I trust that he did what he thought was right and what he thought was best for the country. I trust that Obama will do what he believes is right and best for the country. I'll probably disagree with him a lot, but I will never come close to showing him the disrespect President Bush was showered with daily and hopefully no one else will either. I wonder what a Bush presidency would've looked like if 9/11 never happened...
The Arizona Cardinals are going to the Super Bowl. I did not see that coming. The Cardinals last home playoff game was in 1947 in CHICAGO! And now they've won two home games and a road game and are on their way to Tampa. (Notice I did not put an asterisk next to that Cardinals tidbit because of the overkill that is Super Bowl hype I'm pretty sure most of you already knew that. But for those of you that didn't, add it to that big ol' stack of rapport I've got goin' on.)
I for one hope the Cardinals win. Not because I hate the Steelers with all the burning hotness of 10,000 suns (and I'm talking about the very hot center of the sun which reaches about 27,000,000 degrees F not the chilly 10,000 degree F surface of the sun.)* Okay that is part of the reason. I mean can you blame me. This happened:
But as a fan of a team that loses a lot (roughly a .348 winning percentage since 1991)* I feel like if the Cardinals can get it together, anything is possible. And Kurt Warner is a Renaissance man.
Let's see...PETA decided to rebrand fish as SeaKittens....hahahahahahaha...they hope this gets people to see fish as cute and cuddly not as food...hahahahahahahah....that might be the funniest thing ever. I mean, first they probably should've done SeaPuppies because I'm pretty sure the people that are getting up at 3AM, getting in their truck, going to the lake, boating to their favorite fishing hole and pulling out SeaKittens probably are dog people. Just a guess. They'd probably be okay with a few less cats...that's good stuff. Secondly, you can't just change a name. Shakespeare said it first, a rose by any other name*...
Well, kids, I've gotta jet. I'm taking my wife to see a play tonight. It's got Jeffrey Donovan from Burn Notice in it. If you don't watch Burn Notice, you should. It's kind of like MacGyver, but cooler and newer. New season starts tonight on USA.
I feel like I've built up some great rapport with you here today. We hit on some personal stuff, civil rights, math and science, video game history, and even literature. I'm a wealth of knowledge. Trust me.
Stop working and go play The Legend of Zelda on my Wii.
Oh, that's right...old school Nintendo on my shiny new toy. Stacie and I played Zelda last night until 11.30. Any of your wives play Nintendo with y'all until 11.30 at night? Didn't think so. I win.
Last night I mentioned that we needed to find Link's boomerang to which Stacie responded, "Who's Link?" Well, it turns out she's not alone in her lack of knowledge. A quick search of the world wide web will inform you that most people think the character you use in The Legend of Zelda is, in fact, Zelda. But Zelda is the princess you are trying to save from the Evil Gannon. I'm pretty sure you don't see her at all in the entire game, so it can be understandable why one might think Link is actually Zelda.
I wrote that last paragraph in order to prove to you the vastness of the knowledge bouncing around in my brain. You see, if I convince you that I am knowledgeable in completely useless things, hopefully you will count me as knowledgeable in very useful things. It's called building rapport with the audience. Each time I build rapport with you in this post, I will note it with an * so that you can pause and really appreciate the moment.
Obviously, I am not saving Princess Zelda right now. Zelda has been in need of saving since July of 1987* so I figure she can wait a few more minutes. A lot has happened over the past few days (such as the PlayStation cell phone being put on hold due to less than desirable technical quality*) and I feel like I should comment.
First, we inaugurated America's first not-completely-white President*. Yes that's a rapport building asterisk there because I'm pretty sure everyone thinks he is black. He is. But he is equally white. Truly a president for all!! Except the Hispanics...and Native Americans...and Asians. Did I pull everyone into my very inclusive circle there. Well, if your ethnicity was not listed this is for you "...and Other/Choose Not to Answer." Actually...that's what President Obama would have to check!
If I missed anybody, I'm pretty sure Joseph Lowery, who helped lead the Montgomery Bus Boycott in 1955*, covered them.
Someday, as a white, I hope to do what is right. Amen.
In related current events, President Bush must have felt lighter than air (to find the weight of air: m/V = p / RT = 101325 N/m2 * 1 m3 / (287 J/kg-K * 273.15 K) = 1.2925 kg/m3)* when he woke up Wednesday morning. The weight of the world ( 6,000,000,000,000,000,000,000,000 kilograms, though technically that is the mass of the earth because we get weight from the earth's gravity which obviously doesn't pull on itself)* was literally off of his shoulders. In the now 7.5 years following 9/11 he has done what he promised to do and ensured no terrorist attack took place on American soil under his watch. Everything else is debatable, but that one point is not. And for that and for his service I say thank you. I had the chance to meet and interact with President Bush once when he was the Governor of the Great State*. He's a good man. Much like I'm sure President Obama is a good man. To disagree with his policies and decisions is one thing, but to treat the man like a dog's turd is a whole other story. I trust that he did what he thought was right and what he thought was best for the country. I trust that Obama will do what he believes is right and best for the country. I'll probably disagree with him a lot, but I will never come close to showing him the disrespect President Bush was showered with daily and hopefully no one else will either. I wonder what a Bush presidency would've looked like if 9/11 never happened...
The Arizona Cardinals are going to the Super Bowl. I did not see that coming. The Cardinals last home playoff game was in 1947 in CHICAGO! And now they've won two home games and a road game and are on their way to Tampa. (Notice I did not put an asterisk next to that Cardinals tidbit because of the overkill that is Super Bowl hype I'm pretty sure most of you already knew that. But for those of you that didn't, add it to that big ol' stack of rapport I've got goin' on.)
I for one hope the Cardinals win. Not because I hate the Steelers with all the burning hotness of 10,000 suns (and I'm talking about the very hot center of the sun which reaches about 27,000,000 degrees F not the chilly 10,000 degree F surface of the sun.)* Okay that is part of the reason. I mean can you blame me. This happened:
But as a fan of a team that loses a lot (roughly a .348 winning percentage since 1991)* I feel like if the Cardinals can get it together, anything is possible. And Kurt Warner is a Renaissance man.
Let's see...PETA decided to rebrand fish as SeaKittens....hahahahahahaha...they hope this gets people to see fish as cute and cuddly not as food...hahahahahahahah....that might be the funniest thing ever. I mean, first they probably should've done SeaPuppies because I'm pretty sure the people that are getting up at 3AM, getting in their truck, going to the lake, boating to their favorite fishing hole and pulling out SeaKittens probably are dog people. Just a guess. They'd probably be okay with a few less cats...that's good stuff. Secondly, you can't just change a name. Shakespeare said it first, a rose by any other name*...
Well, kids, I've gotta jet. I'm taking my wife to see a play tonight. It's got Jeffrey Donovan from Burn Notice in it. If you don't watch Burn Notice, you should. It's kind of like MacGyver, but cooler and newer. New season starts tonight on USA.
I feel like I've built up some great rapport with you here today. We hit on some personal stuff, civil rights, math and science, video game history, and even literature. I'm a wealth of knowledge. Trust me.
Friday, January 16, 2009
The Most Ridiculous Post Ever
I've got to be honest with you. I mean, if I'm not honest here, then what's the point of putting virtual pen to virtual paper for the world to read. Ok. Maybe 0.00000021% of the world to read. (That would be 15 of the roughly 6,700,000,000 who currently reside on our planet for those who need to know how I got there.)
I don't feel much like writing at this moment. So, why am I writing, you might ask? I can't really blame you for asking such intelligent questions. I've always told everyone that I have the smartest readership of all the "________ and Blog It" titled blogs. There's the readers of Go and Blog It. They're morons. Stay and Blog It's readership: Imbeciles. Leave and Blog It may have the dumbest readers of them all, though, but I think we all know why that is...and because of that author we also know that grain augers, fireworks and an old taxi cab are not toys. Right kids?
But somehow I've gotten off topic. Why write when I feel so unlike writing?
Well, I've had several moments over the past couple of weeks where I've really wanted to write. Something would hit me, and at that moment I would really want to grab my keyboard and pound it like I'm kneading a big ball of dough. A ball of dough that will rise on my computer screen, and once I hit publish, will then bake into a delicious loaf of awesomeness that we'll all slice and butter and devour as if we were aliens from the planet NoDough who've never experienced the sensation of warm bread and melted butter igniting our purple taste buds on our green alien tongues causing us to exclaim, "Scnlets chpaqy!"
Sadly, though, I've been bogged down in the marshy goo of work. I've felt like Bart, the railroad worker turned Sheriff in Blazing Saddles, when he was sinking in the quicksand on the push car. And his boss comes by and throws a rope, but sadly only to salvage the push car, leaving Bart to search for the sunken rails of the train track and inch his way to the solid earth of safety once more. I have yet to find my sunken rails in the mire of work, however. But when I get out I'm definitely gonna (SPOILER ALERT) hit my boss over the head with a shovel, get arrested and scheduled to be hung and then get miraculously freed to become the Sheriff of Rock Ridge.
So, why now? Why this post? Let's start with the second question first. I have several starts to posts that I found interesting at some point, but they weren't inspiring me quite enough especially with inadequate time to address them. And I feel that may be the case because I've been gone for a bit and feel like we need to catch up. So, I thought it best that we reacquaint ourselves with one another before I get into some post full of deep thoughts and challenging rhetoric. Mixed with tear-inducing hilarity, of course.
So, hello, my name is Ty. I like road trips, Robert Earl, reading, reveling, rafting, roller coasters, Ricky Ricardo, Rounders and alliteration.
There. I feel much better. Now, perhaps I will be able to post something with substance.
And as to the second question, which, of course, is actually the first question now moved to the second position: I just had to. I needed a break from working. I had to take my eyes off of the computer screen, close them and just type away. Like this: "i canoot bleieve I'm typing with my eyes closed. this is Awesome@". Actually that wasn't as bad as I was expecting.
I wanted to post. I tried to post. I couldn't post. And then, I said, "No way man! You are posting. Whether you like it or not."
So, I decided to post the most ridiculous things that came to my brain. And I don't know your thoughts, but I'd say, "Goal Achieved." I would say "Mission Accomplished" but that's kind of lost it's meaning unless one is parachuting down to an air craft carrier with a banner behind them that reads "Mission Accomplished" you know? I went to Kinko's but they were all out of banners, so let's just go with "Goal Achieved."
I don't feel much like writing at this moment. So, why am I writing, you might ask? I can't really blame you for asking such intelligent questions. I've always told everyone that I have the smartest readership of all the "________ and Blog It" titled blogs. There's the readers of Go and Blog It. They're morons. Stay and Blog It's readership: Imbeciles. Leave and Blog It may have the dumbest readers of them all, though, but I think we all know why that is...and because of that author we also know that grain augers, fireworks and an old taxi cab are not toys. Right kids?
But somehow I've gotten off topic. Why write when I feel so unlike writing?
Well, I've had several moments over the past couple of weeks where I've really wanted to write. Something would hit me, and at that moment I would really want to grab my keyboard and pound it like I'm kneading a big ball of dough. A ball of dough that will rise on my computer screen, and once I hit publish, will then bake into a delicious loaf of awesomeness that we'll all slice and butter and devour as if we were aliens from the planet NoDough who've never experienced the sensation of warm bread and melted butter igniting our purple taste buds on our green alien tongues causing us to exclaim, "Scnlets chpaqy!"
Sadly, though, I've been bogged down in the marshy goo of work. I've felt like Bart, the railroad worker turned Sheriff in Blazing Saddles, when he was sinking in the quicksand on the push car. And his boss comes by and throws a rope, but sadly only to salvage the push car, leaving Bart to search for the sunken rails of the train track and inch his way to the solid earth of safety once more. I have yet to find my sunken rails in the mire of work, however. But when I get out I'm definitely gonna (SPOILER ALERT) hit my boss over the head with a shovel, get arrested and scheduled to be hung and then get miraculously freed to become the Sheriff of Rock Ridge.
So, why now? Why this post? Let's start with the second question first. I have several starts to posts that I found interesting at some point, but they weren't inspiring me quite enough especially with inadequate time to address them. And I feel that may be the case because I've been gone for a bit and feel like we need to catch up. So, I thought it best that we reacquaint ourselves with one another before I get into some post full of deep thoughts and challenging rhetoric. Mixed with tear-inducing hilarity, of course.
So, hello, my name is Ty. I like road trips, Robert Earl, reading, reveling, rafting, roller coasters, Ricky Ricardo, Rounders and alliteration.
There. I feel much better. Now, perhaps I will be able to post something with substance.
And as to the second question, which, of course, is actually the first question now moved to the second position: I just had to. I needed a break from working. I had to take my eyes off of the computer screen, close them and just type away. Like this: "i canoot bleieve I'm typing with my eyes closed. this is Awesome@". Actually that wasn't as bad as I was expecting.
I wanted to post. I tried to post. I couldn't post. And then, I said, "No way man! You are posting. Whether you like it or not."
So, I decided to post the most ridiculous things that came to my brain. And I don't know your thoughts, but I'd say, "Goal Achieved." I would say "Mission Accomplished" but that's kind of lost it's meaning unless one is parachuting down to an air craft carrier with a banner behind them that reads "Mission Accomplished" you know? I went to Kinko's but they were all out of banners, so let's just go with "Goal Achieved."
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