The Most Ridiculous Post Ever

I've got to be honest with you. I mean, if I'm not honest here, then what's the point of putting virtual pen to virtual paper for the world to read. Ok. Maybe 0.00000021% of the world to read. (That would be 15 of the roughly 6,700,000,000 who currently reside on our planet for those who need to know how I got there.)

I don't feel much like writing at this moment. So, why am I writing, you might ask? I can't really blame you for asking such intelligent questions. I've always told everyone that I have the smartest readership of all the "________ and Blog It" titled blogs. There's the readers of Go and Blog It. They're morons. Stay and Blog It's readership: Imbeciles. Leave and Blog It may have the dumbest readers of them all, though, but I think we all know why that is...and because of that author we also know that grain augers, fireworks and an old taxi cab are not toys. Right kids?

But somehow I've gotten off topic. Why write when I feel so unlike writing?

Well, I've had several moments over the past couple of weeks where I've really wanted to write. Something would hit me, and at that moment I would really want to grab my keyboard and pound it like I'm kneading a big ball of dough. A ball of dough that will rise on my computer screen, and once I hit publish, will then bake into a delicious loaf of awesomeness that we'll all slice and butter and devour as if we were aliens from the planet NoDough who've never experienced the sensation of warm bread and melted butter igniting our purple taste buds on our green alien tongues causing us to exclaim, "Scnlets chpaqy!"

Sadly, though, I've been bogged down in the marshy goo of work. I've felt like Bart, the railroad worker turned Sheriff in Blazing Saddles, when he was sinking in the quicksand on the push car. And his boss comes by and throws a rope, but sadly only to salvage the push car, leaving Bart to search for the sunken rails of the train track and inch his way to the solid earth of safety once more. I have yet to find my sunken rails in the mire of work, however. But when I get out I'm definitely gonna (SPOILER ALERT) hit my boss over the head with a shovel, get arrested and scheduled to be hung and then get miraculously freed to become the Sheriff of Rock Ridge.

So, why now? Why this post? Let's start with the second question first. I have several starts to posts that I found interesting at some point, but they weren't inspiring me quite enough especially with inadequate time to address them. And I feel that may be the case because I've been gone for a bit and feel like we need to catch up. So, I thought it best that we reacquaint ourselves with one another before I get into some post full of deep thoughts and challenging rhetoric. Mixed with tear-inducing hilarity, of course.

So, hello, my name is Ty. I like road trips, Robert Earl, reading, reveling, rafting, roller coasters, Ricky Ricardo, Rounders and alliteration.

There. I feel much better. Now, perhaps I will be able to post something with substance.

And as to the second question, which, of course, is actually the first question now moved to the second position: I just had to. I needed a break from working. I had to take my eyes off of the computer screen, close them and just type away. Like this: "i canoot bleieve I'm typing with my eyes closed. this is Awesome@". Actually that wasn't as bad as I was expecting.

I wanted to post. I tried to post. I couldn't post. And then, I said, "No way man! You are posting. Whether you like it or not."

So, I decided to post the most ridiculous things that came to my brain. And I don't know your thoughts, but I'd say, "Goal Achieved." I would say "Mission Accomplished" but that's kind of lost it's meaning unless one is parachuting down to an air craft carrier with a banner behind them that reads "Mission Accomplished" you know? I went to Kinko's but they were all out of banners, so let's just go with "Goal Achieved."