Saturday, July 18, 2009

Where've Y'all Been?

My blog has been looking all over for you.

Last time we saw you was sometime in April. You may think that this is my fault, but you'd be looking at the situation all wrong. No. You see, my blog and I have been out looking for you.

In May, we went to Milwaukee for a week to look for you. Twice. You weren't there which wasn't entirely surprising, but we had to start somewhere, right? Since I was in Milwaukee and my company was putting on some training sessions, I decided to participate in those. I was there anyway, right?

Then later in May we went to Dallas to see if we could find you. We didn't find you, but we did have a great time celebrating our little niece, Hallie's, first birthday and we saw lots of family. Me, Come and Blog It and my wife.

We also looked for y'all on the golf course once in May. I shot a 108. You weren't there either. Well, you weren't in the rough, the water or any of the sand traps. It's possible you were on the fairways or the greens.

Then, in early June, we found one of you. My cuz, Kelli came up to Chi to hang out. We had a really good time looking for the rest of you. We looked at a Reckless Kelly concert and at Mary Poppins downtown. No luck. We looked for you at the Green City Market in Lincoln Park and ate some delicious crepes while our eyes darted back and forth scanning the area. We even looked for you during my flag football playoff game. Our quarterback must have been looking for you, too because he threw 4 interceptions leading us to a nice beat down.

Kelli left town then, and we were back to square one.

Next thing I knew, it was my birthday. We decided to take a break from looking for you then. It was my birthday after all. I turned 29. I contemplated writing something poignant and introspective about that to try and lure you out, but I knew you wouldn't fall for that kind of cheese. Plus, the more I thought about it the less it seemed that turning 29 mattered.

After my birthday, we went back to the hardcore search for my readers. We looked at Million Dollar Quartet which is a musical that relives the one and only time Johnny Cash, Carl Perkins, Jerry Lee Lewis and Elvis Presley played together at Sun Records. We were really surprised to not find any of you there because it was awe-wait for it-some!

Then we checked at Schuba's at The Damnwells concert. Not surprised you weren't there. I've been to two of their live shows and they just haven't wowed me. Love their music, just not live.

Then, I put on a fake mustache and we went looking for you...you know, just in case you were intentionally hiding from us. We went to see a band called Stache, too while we were at it. No luck there either.

You had to be sad since we couldn't find you anywhere, so we thought what better place to go than the House of "Blues". We had a whole team of folks out looking for you there. We even got way up high in an opera box so we could look down on the poor saps in general admission...sorry, but we thought you might be one of the saps.

The Avett Brothers happened to be playing there, too. You weren't there, but man, you should have been. The Avett Brothers live is one of the coolest musical experiences on the face of the earth right now. I would describe it for you right now, but trying to use mere words to describe that show would be useless and futile. Find out when they are coming to your area, call my friends Cory and Millie and go with them. Trust me, they'll come for the Avetts.

We spent the Fourth of July searching for you with my friends Lance and Kali. However, unless you were at Game Stop or on my couch while we played Grand Slam Tennis and Mario Strikers then once again my search was a failure. We also tried to find you at Chicago Pizza and Oven Grinder. Once again, no luck. But man, was that a delicious place to look for y'all.

Finally, we thought we'd try looking for you in Dallas again since we were a bit preoccupied during our last search there. We looked for you at Trinity Hall with my brother-in-law and soon to be brother-in-law. Then we searched La Hacienda Ranch. After that we searched The Village Church during my wife's little sister's wedding. But it was 103 degrees that day and I was in a black suit, so I probably was a little to focused on me to find you that day.

After all of that, I thought of one last place that I hadn't looked. And here you are. All of you, right there at your own computer. Some of you are procrastinating at work. A few of you are just killing time on a Saturday afternoon. Many of you are uncontrollably weeping tears of joy now that we've reconnected. I can't say I blame you for that.

Well, I feel much better now that I've found y'all. Try not to go disappearing on me again for so long if you can help it, okay?