Tuesday, May 30, 2006

Share in my boredom...if you dare.

Currently I am taking an online defensive driving course in an attempt to save a little bit of cash on a speeding ticket. I know what you're thinking..."But, Ty, you driving is impeccable. You rarely, if ever, violate the laws of our roads..." While what you are speaking to yourself, in your head at this very moment is factual, allow me to explain myself while I wait for the mandatory time that must be spent on my current section to expire.

The violation occured on an afternoon unlike any I had ever experienced. The usual February chill of North Dallas was forced away by an irrepressible Texas sun. It was hot. As I drove south on Skillman Avenue, I depressed the button on my door briefly. The mechanism inside the door understood my action: the window must go all the way down. As the tinted glass made it's journey, I also pushed the sleeve of my sweater up to let the heat escape. The false cool that morning deceived me, and I fell right into its evil plan as I pulled out a sweater for church rather than a Polo.

It was then, that up ahead I noticed a police car pulling out of a neighborhood with its lights flashing. I thought it odd that he stopped at the stop sign, allowing me to pass, but at the same time police in this area quite often use their ability to speed and drive in emergency-mode merely to hasten their trip home or to the nearest 7-11. I have even seen officers fly by school buses letting children off at the end of the day, no lights flashing, while the rest of us followed the law and stopped.

As I passed the street the officer turned in behind me, but kept at an odd distance, inconsistent with that of an officer intent on pulling a vehicle over. Was I speeding? I don't think so. Maybe. Who knows? I know I'm in no hurry. It's Sunday afternoon. I'm with my wife, my love. Why rush? I was meeting friends at my house so that they might borrow season four of Smallville, but they were right behind me. No hurry whatsoever.

"Should I pull over?"

"I don't know."

"He's not coming after me. He's so far back. I'll turn right at Mockingbird and see if he follows me."

I put on my blinker and proceed through the green light. The officer stays back at least one hundred yards, but he does turn to follow me. Maybe if I switch lanes, then I'll be able to tell if he's really after me. Left blinker. Left lane.

The cop does nothing. Whew. I didn't think he could be...wait. Now he's changing lanes. Okay...well, what if I move back. Right blinker. Right lane. The cop...nothing. Wait a minute. Dang it! He must be after me. Is he?

"I'm just going to turn onto this side street, stop and see what he does."

You must realize all of this occured over the course of less than one mile. Nevertheless, the cop approaching my window is slightly pissed off with an obvious chip on the ol' shoulder.

"When did you see my lights come on?" he demands.

"Well...they were already on when I saw you coming out of that neighborhood, but I wasn't sure if you were..."

"You have to stop when you see lights flashing."

"I just wasn't sure you were coming for me...you were so far back."

"It doesn't matter. That's a good way to get drug out of your car. You have to stop; it's in the book." Now I'm pissed off. First don't threaten to drag me out, drag me out. Second, please do not call my '97 F-150 a "car" unless you want to get drug out. And third, I call BS on that being in the driver's manual. Sure you have to move out of the way, but stop? No way.

GIVE THE RIGHT-OF-WAY TO EMERGENCY VEHICLES

You must yield the right-of-way to

police cars, fire trucks, ambulances,

and other emergency vehicles

which are sounding a siren or

bell or flashing a red light by

pulling to the right edge of the

roadway and stopping.


Awww...dammit!!!

Moral: Read the manual.....yeah right! Damn the manual! Save the Empire! Back to DD for me. I'll keep you updated.