Day One down. Can I get to Day 2?

P90X.

Ever heard of it?

I decided a few weeks ago that it was something I needed to try for a couple of reasons. But before I get into that, let me tell you what exactly is this P90X I speak of. To put it simply, it is a workout program you can do from the comfort of your own home.

To give be more specific, you pay a guy to come to your home and smack you around every morning. Well, he doesn't actually show up. But he's right there on my TV, gloating about how he could "do a hundred of these push ups" while I struggle to execute my 12th.

What possessed me to invite such a barbarian into my home?

Great question. See, my friend PJ introduced me to the program a few weeks ago. He's been doing it, and it's muscled him up a bit. I've been wanting to get back the muscle definition I used to have for a while now, but even when I would go to the gym I always did the same things and never really progressed like I wanted.

Plus, the way I see it, I can order P90X, buy the necessary equipment I need and I'm out $300 or so. To keep my gym membership (in Chicago, mind you) for a year is almost a grand. Granted P90X is a 90 day workout. But let's be honest, did I go to the gym 90 days last year?

Actually, I think I did, but certainly not enough to justify the expense. And once I finish this program, hopefully, I'll be fit enough to maintain my sweet bod with regular running and biking and push ups and such. We'll see.

There's another little thing, the mean man in the TV has insisted I do.

Eat smartly.

He even gave me a book.

I should throw it at him.

I kid, I kid. I actually eat okay. Thankfully, I married a woman who, other than her notorious candy-loving sweet tooth and occasional craving for cheap hot wings, likes to eat fresh and healthy. Ergo, I eat fresh and healthy.

But still, with me doing all of this work, I don't want to screw it up by eating so-so. So, I guess the only bacon I'll be seeing for a while will be this guy:

Hit me with that fine strip o' bacon!

Bye-bye, Reese's Pieces that I love so much. Adios, too much chips and guacamole.

Those are pretty much my food vices.

I did Day One this morning. I was pretty sure that I was going to throw up half-way through, but I just paused it and laid on the floor with my eyes closed for a few minutes. Then I unpaused and the jerk told me that it was okay to push the pause button but don't sit down. He suggested I "shake it out", whatever that means. "It" was definitely almost "out" though, for sure.

Can I make Day Two? I think so. But Day 90? Lord, beer me strength.