Who Doesn't Love Recess?

Apparently everybody in America.

America declared recess yesterday. And apparently we've been at recess since December of 2007!

But everyone is all like, "Oh no. We're in a recess." and "If we're not in a recess, we're not far from it." and "This recess is really going to hurt my business."

Remember when everyone wanted recess? I mean, in 7th grade once (when recess is supposed to start being a bad thing) we crawled out of the windows to go play Wall Ball and military style basketball when recess was finally offered.

Remember jungle gyms and swing sets and see-saws and football games and freeze tag? Recess is awesome. Why would America not want...hold on a sec.

What's that...? Recess-shun.

Recess-shun?

Same thing right?

No....

Hmmm.....oh....well that kind of changes this post a little.


So, apparently recess and recession are not the same thing. In fact, they are kind of the opposite. Recession is probably more similar with detention. Nobody wants it (except when Zack Morris kept trying to get it because Kelly Kapowski was going to be there.) It's not fun. And you just have to wait it out for 30 minutes to an hour. If this recession is longer than an hour I'm gonna be really pissed. I'm supposed to meet some friends after it to get a coke at Sonic and do the drag.

So, now that we've found ourselves in this detention hall called Recession, what should we do while we're here? Some people have decided to spend the whole hour scheming about how to get out sooner. They're offering bribes of about $750 billion to various school bullies in here with us thinking they can sneak everyone out.

But all that's done is gotten all the bullies in detention riled up and wanting in on the sneak out job. Plus they have to borrow that money from other people not in detention...it's a mess.

Personally, I say we just do our time. Let the clock tick and let's get out of here. But I get the feeling no one else in Recession hall agrees. It seems like everyone wants to find the easy way out. But the bottom line is we're in detention for a reason. Let's do the time and think about what we did wrong and promise never to do it again.

Oh, I forgot, that's called taking responsibility for our actions. People don't do that anymore.

Wait a minute. Two kids in here just agreed with me. One kid named Texas and one kid named South Carolina. Weird parents, I guess. Here's what they had to say:


"Governors Against State Bailouts
Hard to believe, but not everyone in politics wants a free lunch.
By RICK PERRY and MARK SANFORD posted in the Wall Street Journal

As governors and citizens, we've grown increasingly concerned over the past weeks as Washington has thrown bailout after bailout at the national economy with little to show for it.
In the process, the federal government is not only burying future generations under mountains of debt. It is also taking our country in a very dangerous direction -- toward a "bailout mentality" where we look to government rather than ourselves for solutions. We're asking other governors from both sides of the political aisle to join with us in opposing further federal bailout intervention for three reasons.

First, we're crossing the Rubicon with regard to debt.

One fact that's been continually glossed over in the bailout debate is that Washington doesn't have money in hand for any of these proposals. Every penny would be borrowed. Estimates for what the government is willing to spend on bailouts and stimulus efforts for this year reach as much as $7.7 trillion according to Bloomberg.com -- a full half of the United States' yearly economic output.

With all the zeroes in the numbers, it's no wonder Washington politicians have lost track.

That trillion-dollar figure is the tip of the iceberg when it comes to checks written by the federal government that it can't cash. Former U.S. Comptroller General David Walker puts our nation's total debt and unpaid promises, like Social Security, at roughly $52 trillion -- an invisible mortgage of $450,000 on every American household. Borrowing money to "solve" a problem created by too much debt seems odd. And as fiscally conservative Republicans, we take no pleasure in pointing out that many in our own party have been just as complicit in running up the tab as those on the political left.

Second, the bailout mentality threatens Americans' sense of personal responsibility.

In a free-market system, competition and one's own personal stake motivate people to do their best. In this process, the winners create wealth, jobs and new investment, while others go back to the drawing board better prepared to try again.

To an unprecedented degree, government is currently picking winners and losers in the private marketplace, and throwing good money after bad. A prudent investor takes money from low-yield investments and puts them in those that yield better returns. Recent government intervention is doing the opposite -- taking capital generated from productive activities and throwing it at enterprises that in many cases need to reorganize their business model.

Take for example the proposed Big Three auto-maker bailout. We think it's very telling that each of the three CEO's flew on their own private jets to Washington to ask for a taxpayer handout. No amount of taxpayer largess could fix a business culture so fundamentally flawed.

Third, we'd ask the federal government to stop believing it has all the answers.

Our Founding Fathers were clear and deliberate in setting up a system whereby the federal government would only step in for that which states cannot do themselves. An expansionist federal government of the last century has moved us light-years away from that model, but it doesn't mean that Congress can't learn from states that are coming up with solutions that work.

In Texas and South Carolina, we've focused on improving "soil conditions" for businesses by cutting taxes, reforming our legal system and our workers' compensation system. We'd humbly suggest that Congress take a page from those playbooks by focusing on targeted tax relief paid for by cutting spending, not by borrowing.

In the rush to do "something" to help, federal leaders would be wise to take a line from the Hippocratic Oath, and pledge to do no (more) harm to our country's finances. We can weather this storm if we commit to fiscal prudence and hold true to the values of individual freedom and responsibility that made our nation great.

Mr. Perry, a Republican, is the governor of Texas. Mr. Sanford, a Republican, is the governor of South Carolina."


I kinda like these kids, Texas and South Carolina. Maybe we'll finally start to wait this little setback out after all. And while we're in here maybe we can catch up on some schoolwork and learn how to not get sent here again.

But until then, I'm gonna go see if I can find Kelly. I heard she got framed so she'd have to serve detention with us and she's rockin' some awesome early '9os flowery pants...yowza.