Who gives you the bird on Thanksgiving?

And I'm not talking about your grandma serving you some delicious turkey either.

I'm talking about driving down the road on Thanks-freaking-giving Day and getting the bird from two dudes in a pickup. Not kids either. One was no less than 45. The other, no less than 60.

Let me take you back there with me. (Do that Wayne's World thing with your hands and make that "doo-dee-doo, doo-dee doo" noise now, please.)

So, I'm driving to my Aunt Nedra's to see my dad's side of the family for Thanksgiving. We got up early that morning, took the dogs to Carrollton and now it's about 8:30 AM, and we are cruising.

The next thing you know there is a cop on the side of the road with someone pulled over. (Now keep in mind...I am not speeding. Been busted for that twice this year already, so I posess extra motivation to drive the speed limit.)

So, what do people do when they see a cop? They all slow way down and get in the lane opposite where he has someone pulled over. So far so good. We all move to the left lane. Then, when you pass by the cop you resume your normal speed.

Here's where our story takes a foul turn. Pun intended.

Everyone but a truck two spots ahead of me speeds up. I can see this guy is on his phone. No big deal if you don't want to speed up, but pull to the right if you're going to go 57 in a 70. He never moves, so the car in front of me begins to pass him on the right.

I think to myself, "Okay...I'll do that, too."

The only problem is that when this guy realizes he's only going 57 and he's being passed on the right he decides to speed up. At this point I am ahead of him, but not so far ahead as to make the safest move into his lane. I see I am coming very quickly upon the truck ahead of me. What to do?

No way am I not getting in here. This dudes just being a jerk now that he knows he's getting passed. So I mash it and slide in between him and the truck, with plenty of room to spare, but I'm sure Mr. Indecisive had to put the brakes on.

Well, now Mr. Indecisive is very decisive. He decides to ride my tail as close as he can. His truck is slightly larger than mine, but I'm not intimidated. I do however decide that if he wants to speed, I'll let him by.

So I get around the semi beside me and pull to the right. He begins to pass me, but instead of passing on by, slows to my speed so we are even and issues his unseasonal gesture. Along with his old man in the seat next to him.

I'm pretty shocked, but pretend not to see it. Don't want to give them any pleasure, you know?

The car behind us saw it, though. And then they speed up to us and in an effort to make sure we see it, proceed to return the same gesture to the men in the pickup as they pass them...on the right.

We soon enter a construction zone so I have to follow behind these guys for miles. 68S-MJ2. 68S-MJ2.

When we leave the construction zone, these men have forgotten, once again, the speed limit, but they are at least on the right side of the road. As I speed up to 70 again, I slide by them and never glance their way. Like I never even noticed their unseemly act.

On Thanksgiving Day.